&t skeet on mischa: 04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005

skeet on mischa

i wouldn't have given you it if i didn't agree

Apr 30, 2005

stache off

seriously, effin so hot. hot, hot.

Apr 29, 2005

not in my name

first, he takes the country into a completel unnecessary war over nothing, then he's screaming about the country needs to solve the ever so pressing problem known as steroid use in major league, now george w. bush pre-empted "the oc" to talk about nothing. while, this particular season of "the oc" has been very undelicious, i'll just say this, the worst episode of "the oc" totally beats the best speech ever said by george w. bush. there wasn't a pressing need to air this press conference during "the oc" when there is fox news channel, cnbc, msnbc, cnn, cspan 1, 2, and 3, cnn headline news, jay leno's horrible monologue, the 11 o'clock newscast, npr, kfi, the daily show, the internet and of course, newspapers. the network should not have the decision for me, if i wanted to hear what the dude had to say, i would've tuned into cnn, but luckly, i was in class (although, i was watching the rather dreadful suicide circle). i want to see falkor barton try to be emotional, not hear some guy try to convince that gas prices will go down. i want see trey get it on with that one girl who reminds me of somebody i worked with, not see some guy back pedal and try to win back the religious community after dropping the ball on the terri schiavo situation. i want see peter gallagher bein' peter gallagher.

it'll be on next week, which is cool and all, but hey, why not show the episode at 9 instead of running that horrible show with paris hilton. you know, spare us that bullshit that's as phoney as katie holmes & tom cruise's relationship. it's a win-win situation.

speaking of paris hilton, i saw this interview with her and they were talking about how risquee it was to do a scene in house of wax in bra & panties and the whole, 'oh, what is your dad gonna think?' aspect of it. talk about throwing softballs, but come on. why didn't they ask her about being a role model to young girls and never graduating high school.

gnarls barkley dot com has gone live and just wait around to hear cee-loo rapping over violent femmes samples. dangermouse is the new pharrell cept dangermouse won't be all over the videos pretending to be a skater.

some body the other day asked me to donate blood as if he was asking me to sign a petition. yeah, giving blood is good and all, but isn't it something that one has to plan for or center the day around the event of giving blood. you know what if i give blood and i have a pop quiz later that day and i pass out during it cause i gave blood. it's these things that i think about. also, i wonder if julian casablancas wrote the song, "the end has no end" about being in line at price club.

the thigh master's list of 50 hottest people; beyond best ever. yet seriously though, julia roberts=not beautiful unless you're into gigenmorus veins and egos the size of africa. if the skeet shooter was to ever make a list, you just know that kathleen hannah, artie lange, camilla belle, johnny from the blood brothers and rachel bilson would be on on the tippy top of our list.

paulina rubio, a one woman revival of the village people or picking up the torch where the village people left it, but nobody asked her to.

steven soderbergh's movies to now go directly to dvd and tv as well as hit the big screen via digital projection or some deal struck up with that loser of a basketball team owner, mark cuban. yeah, soderbergh can do all these interesting, digital projects and be groundbreaking, but it doesn't change the fact he hasn't made a decent film in five years. remember traffic?

and for those who are going to coachella this weekend, while i may not be going, i've made a nifty list of what i would be watching if i was there:
-m83 in the gobi tent @ 3;40
-the kills in movaje @ 4:50
-water break
-rilo kiley for a smidge @ the outdoor stage @ 6:20
-wilco @ the main stage @ 6:45
-dinner break
-camping out for a good spot in the mojave tent for bloc party @ 9:30
-go back to the hotel after bloc party unless you wanna fall asleep standing up during coldplay;

-diplo @ 2 in the sahara tent
-now you could either way, but this is the biggest rub scheduling moment of the whole thing: you have m.i.a. at 4:10 in the gobi tent while at 4:20 on the outdoor stage is the fiery furnaces. it's a win-win, lose-lose situation.
-food break
-the arcade fire @ 6:45 in the outdoor stage
-new order @ 7:30 on the main stage
-matmos in the gobi tent @ 8:50
-the blood brothers @ 10 in the mojave tent and you're done for the day.

while it may be a fashion fuble to some, i can't recommend wearing cargo shorts enough. while, it's going to be in the 80s this weekend, a breeze going up your legs is always nice and with cargo pockets, you got a spot to carry your water with you. 'oh, where's my water?' then boom, you pull it out of that side pocket and have a nice, cool sip. be warn that if you wear shoes with straps and no socks, there will be tan lines. if it's at all possible, put some visual mark on your car because you could end in that dusty parking lot into the wee hours of the morning and also, when leaving the parking area, let a person in; everybody is in the same situation, so there's no need to be a dick about things. let a person in and the person you just let in, will let somebody else in.

and for those of us who aren't going because we either don't have the money nor the time, just remember that probably the band you wanted to see the most, will be back in southern california in the summer time at a reasonable price, decent venue and mostly important, a time of the day that works for you unless you're a waiter or a paramedic.

Apr 28, 2005

zombies weird me out

the reason why anthony fedorov will never be voted off "american idol" is cause he appeals to this weird demographic, 8 to 12 year old girls. to these girls, anthony is anybody but threatening; they see themselves out for a ride on a unicorn while anthony gentlely sings "when a man loves a woman" (which they call their favorite michael bolton song) into their ear and maybe picking some flowers after a lovely tea party. you know a guy like those grunge revivalists/second comings of scott stapp just scare young girls; they want an idol who makes them feel like a pretty, pretty princess or at least play a game of pretty, pretty princess with 'em.

i can't explain scott savol's success though. i mean, could america, since it's an overweight country be rallying all of their support behind him. is there a common thought of 'he's like me, so i'm gonna vote for him even though he sorta sucks.'

i'll tell you one thing that doesn't suck, mandy moore. still cute, perhaps even a bit more cuter with a basset hound in hand. i see her as the type to pick up after her, unlike myself. i had to have a sense of fear instilled in me by some guy from across the street before i start picking up dog business. although, i worry that carrying a dog business bag in your back pocket is apart of the infamous hanky code cause some middle age dude in convertable was checking me out weirdly the other day. slightly related: the guy who yelled has either a friend or co worker or brother who happens to be one serious racists or in toby keith terms, a true american because all over the windows on his camper shell is written stuff like, "proud support of our troopers on the border," "i <3 the minutemen," "if you want to save california, control the border," you know stuff like that.

ever notice that the barkers have alot of yes people and hanger-on's? it just seems basically anybody whose a friend of theirs is paid to hang around them and go to the louis vuttion store and get stuff. it may be a case of 'spreading the wealth,' which is nice, but at the same time, doesn't it seem rather sad because basically, you're paying somebody to be your friend. i mean, i got summer school for like a month, but pretty much from july to like late august, i open for any position as a celebrity friend. i got some one liners, i got some good stories and more importantly, i wax the car known as your ego. all i ask in exchange for my services, a place to stay, doesn't have to be at home, but a near by hotel is cool; gas money, free food and a recommendation letter. the only thing i'm not willing to do is wear your clothes if you have a clothing company; while, your clothes are simply the best and the hottest things since marc jacobs started making clothes, i gotta rock my own stuff, can't explain why, but i just got to. i'll be the designated driver, i'll be the guy who takes out the trash at 8 in the morning while you're nursing that killer hang over, i'll throw eggs at wanye brady's house, whatever it takes to be your profesional bff.

as you know, this week and last week, we've got the chance to either see or hear bits and pieces from things coming out this summer. from the rather lackluster (hi coldplay) to the good (new kanye & white stripes) to the mind blowing (neon blonde & george romero's land of the dead), well, your humble narrator has some how managed to see pilot for the fall season. i'm not at liberty to say what show or how i saw this show, but i can tell you this much, it was very funny and if anything felt like a sequel or continuation of undeclared. so hopefully, it will get picked up because it will be a shame for those who like to laugh cause what, we got like 48 animated projects from seth mcfarlane on fox next season, and like the freddie prinze jr show with brian austin green, and you know all of those things will be piss your pants funny.

Apr 27, 2005

chandeliers and vines

i dunno if you caught last night's episode of "i want a famous face" with crystal and her attempt to look britney spears, so she could get more confidence and finally pursuing that impossible dream of becoming a stripper in orange county. so we see crystal checking out a strip club and of course, it's not one in her own town, but it's one in my town (there are two strip clubs in my town and basically, they're right down the street from each other, conviently located near the 5 freeway and if you want to be super picky, on certain thursdays, there's a third strip club in town called club glam). unfornately, your humble narrator has been to this particular strip club and i really identified with crystal as she was crying in her jeep while debating whether or not to be apart of amateur night. dudes, she made the right move because that place is so sketchy and creepy, and frankly, the women aren't too friendly to nerdy guys who want to talk about q & not u and the works of pablo neutra (if you're a close friend, then you know who i'm talking about). i mean, we're trying to strike up a conversation and we want to know if the girl we're thinking of getting a lapdance from is into cool stuff. you know, i can't be in a situation where the girl is grindin' against and the dj starts to play afi all of a sudden and she shouts to me, while in the process of getting body glitter over the jeans, "oh my god, i love this song. afi is like my favorite band, ever." i'm already tension enough as is.

can we get a hurry up of sorts for this neon blonde album? shit is beyond redonklcious. if you're going to whoachella, bug johnny about it or at least request them to do "chandeliers and vines" a whole mess of times, but only if it's one of those little tents; you're going to be yelling about nothing if it's one of those big fields. someone like a jonas akerlund should either make all of the videos or at least make a musicial using these songs.

a word of advice from me to you about whoachella, this weekend. if the hotel, you're staying at as a pool and you're doing the two day thing, on sunday, don't get up early, wake up whenever, go for a swim, take a shower, grab a nice meal, then cruise over. i mean, on sunday, you only gotta see what the blood brothers, diplo, m.i.a., arcade fire, fiery furnaces, then you're home, probably even in enough time to catch the season premiere of the shit storm known as "american dad," just so you can say, they took off arrested for this horseshit?

speaking of arrested development, go to this site, sign up, and instill yourself with a sense of false hope that it won't get canceled. then tell two friends and then they'll tell two friends.

everybody's on the wavelength that paula abdul is about one painkiller away from pulling an anna nicole and telling vonzell that they'll make 'beautiful music together,' but then she'll up the ante but getting on top of the judges' table and busting into an acapella version of "straight up," to which randy jackson will say, "it was kinda hot, but pitchy."

isn't weird to hear somebody bump the dip set in their car really loudly? i mean, like in new york, yeah, i see it, but i mean, isn't a major portion of the dip set fan base, goofy indie rock kids and not dudes in corvettes that their dads bought cause they squeezed through high school with a 1.8 gpa.

good news for those without hbo, curb your enthusiasm season 4 dvd in the very near future.

i honestly put a bit of thought into my proposed remake of michael bay's the rock. basically, it could either be an olsen twins vehicle or a duff sisters vehicle. personally, i see the duff sisters in this one, as a pair of sisters whose mother recently pasted away living in san fran with their brother (jimmy fallon) who works as a tour guide on alcatraz island. while hiliary and haylie are shopping for furry boots, they pass by a tv set with breaking news that their brothers, along with a group of tourists, including that one lady who said "i should've brought my motherfucking gun" in the orignial film have been taken hostage by an elite group of terrorists led by willem dafoe with the overall goal of world domination or money, i dunno, it's all the same in these action movies. so hil and hay jump into action, but are thwarted by the sfpd, who tell them that a couple of teenage girls can't solve a hostage situation, yet one man believes they can, hil and haylie's estranged father played by russell crowe, who also happens to be super duper army guy or something; well basically, he's exactly like arnold in commando. and somehow, there's a wacky character whose in love with one of the duff sisters named, caligula exxxplosion; he's like everybody's favorite, napoleon, but even more wackier and gets to fight elite terrorists.

and finally, much like the same way suburban white kids assimilated to hip hop culture, well, hipsters, i dare to say this, but your lifestyle is in the process of being assimilated by the ever dreadful, regular folks. i think regular folks are hungry for good music, for example, i had to take my car in, to have a tire fixed (actually, our hate mail comes in the form of nails in our car's tires) and i was listening to "beauty & the beat" by edan in my car; when i gave the guy my car, it was on track 1 and by the time, i got it back, it was on track 9. scary sign number 1, tire repair dudes are diggin' upon edan and just the other day, i was cruising through a parking lot when i saw a cable repair guy, rocking out to the arcade fire at full blast in his car. i mean, what's next? the united states postal service delevring the mail while listening to postal service remixes on their ipod? you can't get any help at the bank because the tellers are too busy talking about the shins show they went to last night while the other is talkin' about the ravonettes? hold music will now feature the likes of the pixies and the mars volta? what is sacred nowadays with the hipsters? probably, they'll be carrying a speciality line of diseal jeans at wal-mart pretty soon, too.

Apr 26, 2005

fair and balanced

sometimes, we at skeet on mischa, get a bit caught up in our own stories like how ann coulter gets caught with the blow when she's partying with rahad jackson and playing baseball. so, we forget our journalstic pratices and responbilities sometimes in the pursuit of fair and balance reporting. in yesterday's entry entitled, "demolition," we attacked the band, the adored as potentially being a reason as to why people may miss out on lcd soundsystem's show. well, folks, we were wrong about that, after briefly speaking with members of the adored, we've learned that the band we should've been accusing is the colour. so basically replace all the times where we mentioned the adored and replace it with the colour. (only cause the colour is the headliners)

it doesn't matter to us that we may know some fans of the colour and they're good peoples and some of them even have really nice bodies, but you know, look at those dudes in the colour, it's all about cheek bones and not power chords with them.

also, lately, we've been a bit hard on rachel bilson and her backside (no pun intended) or at least a lack there of. well, as one read pointed out to us, her apperance in stuff magazine, which lead us to sorta change our stance about rachel b. she's still the cutest thing on the o.c., even though her storyline is entering into that annoyning world known as ross & rachel-dom and frankly, you know, we never thought about baggy pants. sometimes, a boot cut can be a bit baggy.

and finally, we'd like to apologize to the girl, we thought had breast implants. apparently, they're real and they're probably spectular.

-music for robots has some neon blonde for your ears; it's the blood brothers, but if they made noiser zero 7 style songs.
-michael bay just lost all of his cool points; no matter how good that scarlett johansson/ewan mcgregor movie is, to even think about doing a remake of hitchcock. i mean, remaking shitty horror movies, yeah, sure, go for it and rock on, but hitchcock is untouchable. i mean, how would michael bay like me doing a remake of the rock with hiliary & haylie duff and shots that would last up to 7 seconds or even complete scenes played out in wide masters. imagine that horror, dude!

Apr 25, 2005


lakers' gm mitch kupchak is gonna do an autobiography called, "yes, i can; if kobe bryant says it's okay". does everybody and kid sister believe that kobe will have a definate say in who'll be the coach for next season; shit, i bet kobe will be on the phones on draft day, trying to trade up and down; running trials for potential picks. yet, what the lakers really need to look into in the off season, time travel. seriously, find a way to come back to like summer '04 and say, "suicide you later, skater" to kobe and take phil and shaq attack out to steve aoki's dad's resturant and say, "you're the best. so what's it gonna take to get you back in purple and gold?"

they said it first, not me; but yeah, only i think we're talkin' about different things, we're sorta of on the same wave length.

please don't confuse me with this doug reinhardt; same county, just vastly different lifestyles.

maybe your city is cool and showing godard's masculine feminine, check here and probably be disapointed cause yr city is a sucker.

if you're like me, then you definately like your jessica alba to be wearing next nothing and more importantly, saying nothing as well. while, i can't say she won't be talking, i just know that jessica alba will be on tonight's trippin', outfoxing came'ron diaz and just makin' every dude mad cause you know, hot chick rage. [image via jessica-alba.ws]

people can say whatever they want to say about brittany murphy, but now, she's beyond cool in my book. while i can't find a story or at least, i don't know enough of the celebrity gossip sites, but brittany murphy is dating a crew guy, a best boy grip, to be specific. and i honestly don't believe it's none of this julia roberts, i'm so shallow and have a extremely frail ego that i can't be in a relationship with anybody who has the possiblitlies of becoming more successful than i am, so i date a crew guy things. brittany murphy is just doing cause she found love, ll cool j style. so, to all actresses out there, don't look down upon the crew guy who may be undressing you with his eyes at the craft services table, it might be the start of a beautiful relationship.

so, i checked out ticketmaster the other day and the lcd soundsystem show at the el rey in may hasn't sold out yet. what the fork? i mean, sure, it seems pretty shitters that m.i.a. isn't on the bill anymore or so sayth her website, but hey, pitchfork says other wise; so you know, since everybody is into gambling these days, why not take a chance to see if m.i.a. shows up or not, but here's the thing, you're gonna win anyways, cause lcd soundsystem is playing. take it from me, they're amazing live. i went to coachella last year, just to see them, radiohead was a bonus and it was extremely worth it. i saw them late last year at the echo, amazing show, but all of you la kids blew it cause you had to watch interpol for like the fifth time. so don't blow it this time, dudes. it's sunday, may 15th. you have no excuses to miss it; "arrested development" is done for the season and let me tell you what's gonna happen on the episode of "desperate housewives," you'll miss, terri hatcher falls down and makes a big scene in public, eva longoria is short and buys a pair of shoes, felicity huffman yells at her kids and marica cross acts like mathra stewert; there you go, you're all caught up. so your tv excuses are gone. final weeks, i might let it slide, but i mean, if i'm going and it's the week before finals, then you gotta go, cause nobody is more studieous than me this semester (hello? i missed bloc party's tour of la cause of mid terms; do you think i'm gonna miss this?) other shows, now lcd soundsystem has been the victim of other shows going on at the same time. at coachella, it was the pixies reunion and as mentioned before, interpol in october, but this time, there's nobody playing tonight. it's the only show in town that night. seriously, if you have the ablity to see lcd and pass on it to see like the adored at the troub, then i want you to stop reading this blog. no, really, please stop. if you would pass one of the few chances to see james murphy perform and probably do an amazing live version of "on repeat" to see a band like the adored, a club bang band that isn't allowed to have their records carried in amoeba. i mean, if you would pass a chance just to let loose and dance to amazing music to see a band that probably spends more time on doing their hair instead of writing good songs and won't be around in a year or two and probably started to make dancier songs after a little number called "house of jealous lovers" made all the cool kids dance again, then fine, be my guest, i can't stop you for having bad taste in music, but i would like to stop reading skeet on mischa.

although, if anybody from my school is reading this, can you not book the adored for any lunch time concerts the rest of the semester because i have a fear that they may hang around and jump me after my class or something and i don't have a posse yet. so you know, getting beaten up by a bunch of dudes in beatle boots in front of the girl who looks like kathleen hannah will be not good for the rep.

does anybody else remember when mtv news actually was a show that had interviews with bands by kurt loder and wacky on tour segments with tabitha soren and the band flirts with her and there was some overtly political segment with alison stewert that'd just fall on deaf ears and there was sort of a gray area about john norris' sexual preferences and there was anybody named gideon yago? anybody remember that? all it is nowadays, is some 30 second soundbite that took about two hours time to get out of hiliary duff about her new movie or how good charolette is going on tour with simple plan and it's being called "shit sandwich part 2: cause one of us alone is not enough shit to deal". i mean, there's no way to change things because 'the kids' don't want interviews with musicians as they work on their new albums unless it's like 50, playing the tony montona card or it's eminem further proving that he's the howard hughes of rap. i wouldn't mind if they bring back the week in rock and do stories about my chemical romance or whatever the it band is at the time because it'll actually give me a better idea of why i don't like the band; provide more fuel for the fire (as it stands, imo, my chemical romance aint so bad; they're just a bunch of nerdy kids who play with make up and scream alot). i think its possible to squeeze a week in rock show back into the line up, i think we can stand to loose the 10 times "punk'd" is on daily for a weekly news show. there can be time for moments of self importance with gideon yago covering some drug issue or doing a piece on bloc party or whatevs and you can have time for john norris to do interviews with kylie minogue and you can have time for suchin pak to be hit upon by bad nu new wave bands; imagine the hiliarty known as suchin pak on tour with the bravery. it just seems that the on air news staff has been hurting ever since they fired ian robinson. dudes, look at this as a blessing and actually make a news show where you can talk about your favorite new bands. it's not like i'm asking for zalman king to produce the week in rock.

although, if we could get zalman king to produce a season of the real world or road rules or a road rules/real world challenge would be pretty nice. check out the reality show he's producing, forty deuce. i mean ivane kane is a douche who wishes he was don simpson, but the show has these cool little moments of high gloss, late night skinamax style cinematography of the dancers of forty deuce doing their thing. you know, maybe as a chance to spice up a rather bland challenge where coral and veronica yell at everybody, by injecting some zalman king style of filmmaking. and if he's too expensive, mtv could always go after andrew blake(nsfw).

Apr 22, 2005

franklin comes alive

only if this was a real album and only if this show would be on for another season, but you know, it doesn't pull in that elusterious 'we missed the show the first time around, but we bought the dvds and bought all of the merch that was at two hot topics, like literally, we went to the mall in the next town over and got the wind breaker with stewie on it cause me and "my girlfriend" just have to match and we totally love the show, that's how we met' demographic. [image via the op]

ever notice how on certain fan reviews on aint it cool news, like the guy over emphasis the fact that he has a girlfriend. it's like the second line in the review, 'yeah, me and my girlfriend went to a screening of (insert the name of some mondo retardo sci-fi movie).' way to go, guy with having a girlfriend and all, but the thing is, it has nothing to do with your review of a film in progress. if anything, it's a sign of desperation and phonyness (jerry seinfeld style, no less); i mean, your guy whose sending in a review to aint it cool; you've already narrowed the actualities of you having a girlfriend. is it all a humble attempt to impress those on the talk back? lame like those extremely phoney coke comercials.

i would strike and protest coke over their makin' it real campagin. there's nothing geninue or real about them; it's only 'cool kid' propoganda; if you want to be cool, you gotta be rebelious like this kid who makes crazy lowrider bikes and drink coke or you gotta have a band and play shows, always with a coke and smile. sure, the visual feel is gritty and look like all about lilly chou-chou, but there is no realness to it. so in other words, coke is promoting being fake. i would so boycott, but i just believe that my boycott would go the way of boycott of pepsi after they drop ludacris cause bill o'reilly said to; i drank aquafina and owned stock in pepsi co. you can't boycott and be upset at a company and still own stock in them.

related to a thing from up there earlier: don't you think couples that start to dress alike is the first sign of boredum in a relationship? i dunno, but if that ever happens to me, to quote one brandon flowers, "kill me now, kill me now, kill me now."

i apolgoize if i'm stepping upon any toes, but doesn't the brit brit & k-fed reality show feel it's gonna be exactly like the paris hilton, pam anderon/tommy lee sex tapes minus all the good parts, if you will. from the promos, it's all shaky and hand held, but not in a sexy michael bay way, but, in a we're only talking in baby talk and ending each sentence with pet names sort of way. and the less said about couples mugging for the night vision feature on the sony handycam. oh, i can imagine k-fed say something to the affect, "baby, you look like the incredible hulk."

spine magazine has new kanye west. still out to lunch on it, but i think it'd be pretty nice to hear somebody like lady sovereign over the beat though (been listening to "run the road" comp alot this week). bonus, after listening to new kanye, i got to hear "manhunt" from flashdance.

one thing missing from last night's oddly decent episode of "the trey-c" aka "the oc" that would've put it over the top: the axel foley theme for when marissa and ryan were snooping around, trying to find that drug dealer. how killer were those scenes between trey and sandy, in the car, on stakeout? i smell spin off, but sadly, the episode provided further evidence that rachel bilson has no ass or at least, very little and additionally, it reminded me why i went and got a beer during ben gibbard's solo set at the rilo kiley record release show last summer, death cab is about as exciting as a warm cup of sleepy tyme tea.

can i be repped by caa, please? i'm sure alot of us want an agent, and frankly, i may not speak for everybody, but i'll take anybody i can get, but specifically, i would like to be repped by caa, so my projects can be packaged together with natalie portman to star in them, like this one. i assume, you know, if you were repped by any agent like endevaor, you can get package deals with many cute, young actresses, but with like natalie portman, you've earned a bit of cred to your script. it could be tuna fishin' part 3, but with a name like natalie portman, the thing is already an oscar contender.

seriously though, natalie portman should do a movie like tuna fishin' (check your mr show dvds) because she's either so serious and brutually dramatic or she's acting with robots and pieces of wood like hayden christian or she's working with zach braff; she needs a break from it all and be in a film where farting is commonplace and not as much dog humping peoples' legs.

dude, this girl totally saw that picture of karen o. on the modern age, the other day and im'ed her friend whose a beauty school dropout and asked her if she could come over and cut her hair like karen o.'s; karen o. is the new jennifer aniston.

i judge the potential quality level of a weezer album by the choice of directors for the videos. if you look at the blue album, we had classic videos by spike jonze and sophie mueller. with pinkereton, while it may have been little seen, but there was an amazing video by mark romanek ( watch here). and with the last two albums, all of the videos were done by marcos siega. i guess some people like his stuff, myself, personally, i don't get it; it just seems like he makes the same video over and over again, you know nothing exciting or technically brilliant. so with the new video for the new album, once again, it's directed by marcos siega and it's pretty much a borefest. how can anybody make the playboy mansion boring? well, leave it up to marcos siega. also, the video lacks a certain degree of authencity; you know, i don't see rivers up in the grotto, shooting the shit with miss april and her saline friends. for a song like "beverly hills," they should've gone the jonas akerlund route and had rivers, according to buddyhead, after a cocaine bender, wandering bev hills, looking for mandy amano and ending up, starting a fight at a celebrity poker tourment. that would be more interesting than playing in front of a crowd on the lawn.

or one could use this analogy about the quality of weezer, in van halen terms: matt sharp is like the diamond david lee roth of the band and every other bassit is like sammy hagar. sure, nowadays, they might make an ocassionally good tune here and there, but it aint what it used to be.

and i must extend a big thanks to everybody for the extremely kind words, comments and shout outs over the past couple of days.personally, things have been a crazy as of late, for weird reasons, i'm doing really well in school right now and it's freaking me out. i'm a c + kid and for me, to be getting the marks that i'm getting, you'd be freaking out too. so writing that thing, release a bit of stress, so thanks for bearing with me and i'm just gonna keep on pumpin' out the jams.

Apr 21, 2005

exile on vain street

while the most recent handsome boy modeling school album wasn't that hot with exception to a couple of tunes, like "i've been thinking" with cat power on vocals. pardon me, while i sound slightly stupid for a moment, but that song is the perfect ringtone for late booty calls. that song has that mid 90s downtempo, trip hop vibe to it and to hear coming from your phone, like around 1 in the morning, while brushing your teeths.

of course, in my case, it was an unknown number, asking about how to start up their own blog, not to meet them in a secret spot. although, i wouldn't mind a late night call from finola hughes. have you seen the easy shaper informercials?

so after listening to the new white stripes song a few times now, i'm fully stand by my statements, that riff is pretty much the same riff as death from above 1979's "romantic rights". so jimmy page stole old blues riffs, now jack white gotta steal riffs from other two piece bands? then again, who am i to be talkin' about music? all i know is that regina spektor looked pretty cute on jay leno, the other night. (i tuned in early for conan cause i can't stand cousin sal bits on jimmy kimmel)

i must extend a happy birthday to iggy pop. nowadays, he may make crap records with sum 41 and peaches, but he was on pete & pete and sang "gimme danger". so he'll forever be cool in my book.

has anybody called mike jones yet? he's yelling out his phone number like every three seconds on his new album and i'm just wondering, like what happenes if you call? is it a voice mail where you can drop him a line or basically shout out, "mike jones!" then hang up or is it really his number? cause i worry that if i call, it'll be a bad time. you know, he just sat down to some lunch or he's with his special lady friend and i have to go and ruin everything cause i wanted to tell him that his album is better when it's in slow motion

spike lee is already protesting lars von trier's new film, manderlay, see why here. this'll probably be one of those films that you'll have to buy the korean import dvd of it from like hkflix.com cause nobody in america will release unless that new weinstein venture has balls and won't dick around, releasing bad movies starring that dude from coldplay's wife.

while i did apperciate their portrayal of jillian barberine as a crack smoking spazachtic whose in love with the sound of her own voice, i just can't take a sketch show seriously when it's named, comedy inc.. it could be the most biting, irrevelent, sharp sketch show since mr. show with bob & david, but the fact is the name just screams out, 'bad improv troop' and 'morning zoo'. these guys did a sketch about bad improv troops, of course, it wasn't funny because it just felt an every day occurance for these performers.

if spike tv wants a sketch comedy show, they should buy the rights to the public access show myself and robin brown did back in 2001/02. it was southern orange county's number one source for jokes about jeff goldblum and cute girls doing stupid shit. it was big with stoners cause they would be flippin' around and see like me and some tall blonde wrestling with giant ball on somebody's front lawn. isn't the whole concept behind spike tv is that it's the guys' network, right? so why not have a show that would incoroporate paradoies of the fast & the furious (it was called, "the quick & the agiagted") with bits of cute girls doing stupid stuff like playing the drums? give me an office in santa monica, a couple of writers, let some kids i know direct some things, let me hire some actors i know (well, mainly, just this one girl; only cause i figure, if i get her a job on a tv show, so maybe she'd go out with me), and i can crank out some shit cheaply and quickly. the show will be no mr. show; shit, it won't even be mad tv, but i can safely say, it'll be better than "comedy inc." although, i'll probably need a somewhat high music budget cause i wanna use alot of rap music.

Apr 20, 2005

why part 2

frankly, you may want to print this one out or at least, hope that you have a wireless connection because this is sort of a bathroom read.

so bear with me, i have things on my mind and this was the only way i knew how to get them out. one of these days, it'll all make sense.

-why is it that the day i decided to bump the music loud in my car on my street, i get nothing but dirty looks, yet nobody seems to have a problem when people are washing their car at 9 in the morning on a saturday morning, blasting out nelly
-why were kids, like elementary school kids singing the choruses to limp bizkit and kid rock songs the other day?
-why can't they make a pack of only the red starbursts
-why can't friends be more polite and tell you that you have major pit stains going on and to ease off on the arm rasing for a smidge?
-why is it a constant struggle to break 70mph on the 5 freeway in the afternoon?
-why don't people watch "arrested development" and are these the same people who think jay leno is hilarious?
-why is jaywalking illegal when jay leno's 'jay walking' is legal? jay leno causes more injuries telling bad jokes then somebody whose jogging across a street.
-why does jay leno only wear those denim shirts?
-why do i have so many questions about jay leno?
-why do we care about: paris hilton, nicky hilton, nicole richie, kimberely stewert, jessica simpson and ashlee simpson? why are they constantly in my face with their relationship problems and little dogs, that let's face it within a year or two, will be ignored when either the baby or the latest trendy pet accessory comes along
-why is vh-1 and just tv in general shoving joss stone and the black eyed peas and like john legend into my face? if i wanted to listen to these people, i would. i don't need to hear tom cruise's comments about how awesome joss stone is. she's not awesome and celebrities, in general, have horrible taste in music.
-why can't they retool "the oc" and change the name of it to "the trey-c" and have it be about trey as a magnum p.i. type of detective solving sexy crimes in the oc with like peter gallagner as his sidekick; cause shit is getting boring and tired. wow, seth and summer are together, now, they're not, oh wait, they're back together, no i spoke too soon, geeze louise, just write a character off and spare us the nightmare known as adam brody playing dramatic.
-why did hip hop suck in '96?
-why do i feel like a douche at 'underground' hip hop/california crews shows? you can't dance, but you have to do stupid stuff with your hands and say, "ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh" when ever somebody does a freestyle; i mean, i have clue as to what makes a good freestyle, so i've said "oh" when i saw supernatural rap and started to make fun of a kid who was wearing an ash from pokemon hat cause that was funny, but the rest of time, i just said it to go along with the crowd. not to mention, how it always seems that i'm standing next to the guy whose probably smoking the strongest weed ever and i'm falling over from a contact high.
-why aren't there more follow up shows with reality tv? i'd like to see what's road rules angela outside of the confines of a challenge without coral & the miz jumping around and mixing it up with people over nothing. you know, i want to see what has happened to the crib of sisquo, since now he's working at the foot locker in the beverly center. how's sisquo living now, that's what i want to see.
-why does samaire armstrong, allegedly, have to be on the blow?
-why does the walkmen's song make want to act my age?
-why haven't those five film godard's 66-67 period come out on dvd yet?
-why does the art house movice scene in orange county suck? why can't i go to a midnight movie on a friday night? you know, none of this middle of the week, same night and time as when "lost" is on bullshit. i'm talking about lining up at 11 o'clock in the cold for the road warrior on a friday night with a bunch of trailers for old movies as well.
-why is that the only music i actually hear on mtv2 is on commercials for horrible music from victory records? while, i do enjoy "wonder showzen," it just seems whenever i flip by, it's always the one episode of "wonder showzen" that i've already seen a couple of times or mtv2 is the middle of a shitstorm known as a team sanchez marathon. talk about being beyond durst: straylight run jawns and a bunch of smelly english guys doing bad johnny knoxville impressions, that's what all of the cool kids are into these days.
-why do the simpsons suck nowadays?
-why did they have to show the best or at least what could potentially be the best of the "lost" season finale in their promos?
-why do the ipod ear buds hurt and lack so much bass?
-why do i find it hard to believe that kelly osbourne has seen godard's alphaville? i love godard, but even i fell asleep during that one.
-why did they re elect bush?
-why did we elect the terminator?
-why can't they fix the potholes on the freeway?
-why is it whenever i leave for school in the late morning/early afternoon period, there's only big rigs and moving trucks that think they can hang in the second land on the freeway?
-why isn't there a freeway specifically for big rigs? like the 710 in long beach, but you know bigger, longer and better.
-why isn't there a rosco's house of chicken & waffles in orange county?
-why does everybody loose their mind over in-n-out burgers when clearly tommy's and fatburger are superior?
-why haven't i gotten a haircut yet?
-why do i feel nerdy when i think a shot in a porno is a reference to bunuel? (eon mckai, i'm looking at you)
-why did the lakers have to keep kobe?
-why is jadakiss as hard as it gets?
-why don't producers instead of making ringtones, make beat magazine IE a service in which people pay money and like once a month or every couple of months, a cd comes in the mail with unused beats or a mix of songs that the dude is feeling at the time. just imagine, going to the mailbox and putting out a cd with stuff by like madlib or just blaze.
-why did they have to close lot b?
-why don't i get any hate mail?
-why didn't i think of doing what that cobra snake dude did first?
-why is this year's coachella's line up rather undelicious?
-why is 2005, the revange of the boobs? after being perscuited in 2004 and the countless years in the 2ks, playing second fiddle to the ass, boobs are back in a big way, no pun intended. nowadays, you got movies like sin city with bare boobies all over the place and maybe it's more of a product of my new surroundings, but it just seems like everybody's got a nice rack. girls are letting their spirits free and in the summertime, it's only gonna get better.
-why is sam from the bravery and brandon from the killers in the midst of a bitch fest over the title of 'this generation's duran duran'? let's face facts, the bravery is nothing more than a radio disney version of moving units where as brandon flowers wears body glitter. both are losers in my books, yet oddly, i can't seem to find a way to delete them off my ipod.
-why do people like rob thomas believe that the world is claraming for a solo album? sure, we might've liked "smooth" back in the late 90s but did anybody pick up a matchbox twenty album, post "smooth"? no, so why put out a solo album? (related: there is a videotape somewhere in my office or in orange county, that has myself and robin brown doing a cover of "smooth" and it earned us an 'a' in a production class)
-why is amanda peet so unlikable?
-why aren't there any blogger groupies or at least why i haven't found any blogger groupies?
-why does it seem that the only way to get on mtv is to do a reality show about pop/rock star marriage? so i'm hoping to maybe get one of the girls from the like to get into a fake marriage, so we could be on mtv, promoting various things. it'd be a sham like the barkers, but you know, something might happen.
-why do the blood brothers make me feel so old?
-why does chain reaction smell like pee? i know that it was the place of brutal stabbings and cocaine rings in the past and is haunted by ghosts, but yet why does it smell like pee?
-why did kanye west and abercombie & fitch ruin the popped collar look?
-why does getty images put their logo over the best part of the picture?
-why haven't i stopped this list yet?

Apr 19, 2005

public service announcement

check out super chocolate eruption power hour tonight on chapman radio from 8pm to 9pm, california time.

you know, call in, shoot some shit about the new pope or childhood tramuas. it'll be cooler than cucumbers in cottage cheese.

suicide you later, skater.

is sir mix alot now coming up with the challenges on the fisaco known as the inferno 2? dude, jamie chung was putting 'em on the glass. i just knew there had to be a reason why class got out early and i went against picking up some dinner. although, to the editors of road rules/real world challenge, instead of just playing mike jones as the commercial bumpers, why not play him while jamie chung was putting 'em on the glass instead of some vocoder pop. i like vocoder stuff and all, i mean if i had any friends, i would totally have u.s.e. play my house party, but there's just something special about girls putting 'em on the glass and rap music. they go together like peanut butter on toast or like a chicken sandwich from lee's.

but on the road rules/real world challenge thing, when did it turn into a bunch of people yelling at each other and being overly dramatic and screaming about nothing? i mean, who finds this entertaining to watch? some short chubby girl who has no career so she's spent the past seven years of her life doing these stupid things arguing with some other lame girl about nothing? whatever happened to cool guys doing cool things and hot girls putting 'em on the glass?

sorry white stripes kids, but for my money, the new singles sounds an awfully alot like death from above 1979 or at least from the 15 seconds i've heard of it. i'm trying to keep my ears fresh.

ever imagine somebody's conversation that you see from afar. to you, that metalcore dude is talking with that girl about how he's tired of covering for her in class and always taking notes for her cause she never comes to class and she's smiling and asking pretty please and batting her eyes, and since you know that the metalcore dude has a major league crush, of course he'll do it. yet when you walk by without the headphones on, they're basically talking about each other's weekend and how the girl is really lazy and did nothing but sleep all weekend long.

i saw these two suvs basically spot in the middle of the road the other day and was hoping that they were gonna arguing over who wastes the most gas and who's fault it was for the 3 dollars a gallon gas prices. "no, it's my fault that our country is engaged in a useless war!" "no, it's my fault." sadly, they were just exchanging directions.

Apr 15, 2005

delayed reaction

so, i've been a bit obessessed with mtv's "movie life: house of wax" as of late. yet, the show is filled with faults, namely, it's balant and utter disregard for her royal thighness II in favor of paris hilton standing around saying, "that's hot" or "that's cute". you know, if i wanted to hear that shit, i'd watch the simple life or go inside my local del taco around the same time as the near by high school lets out for lunch and just count down the seconds until i want to stab a pencil in my ear.

while, there's that problem, there's another problem, perhaps an even bigger problem. its named chad michael murray. i've never seen an episode of "one tree hill" nor any film he's been in, but from what i've seen of him on this show, he has to be the most pretenious, douche baggest actor around. somebody needs to offer him an reality check of sorts; you're not russell crowe, you'll never be russell crowe and your show is on the fucking wb, okay. he's always telling the camera crew to not film him while preparing for the big scene; what fucking prep do you need in a movie called house of wax? are you using sense memorey techinques, going all the way back to when your pet kitty died, so you'll have the emotional baggae to perform a fight scene against the evil wax master? get over yourself, dude. what is so wrong with an mtv guy filming his conversation with his agent? basically, any successful actor is an example of luck and why people should gamble because those who are successfull, gambled on themselves and won, in theory of course. so, i don't know, i think that chad michael murray should carry himself with a sense of humanilty and perhaps, a sense of humor.

i've been hanging with actors off and on over the past four months and for the most part, they're decent people. there are some you can talk with about, terry richardson and good records and there are others, perhaps, this is more of a me issue, that you just talk to them about their hybrid car and ask if they know larry david since he has a hybrid, too and get back to your job. with chad michael murray, he's an actor that i believe you can't talk to him about good records nor his hybrid car without fear of getting punched in the face and a pink slip. what a douche.

i must admint that last night's episode of "the oc" was pretty decent. more trey doing drugs and less playing lcd soundsystem, no wait, actually, more trey & james murphy cause royalites are nice. while, the episode was good, i was a bit cocerned about rachel bilson. perhaps, it has already been out there for a while, but in a shot where we see rachel bilson bend down, it appears that she doesn't have that much of an ass. i always thought, she had something back there or does anybody who works on the show know if she left it at home? she's still gotta going on, i'm just disapointed that she doesn't have much of an ass, that's all.

dude, cammy belle got snaked, so hot, that she had to be spotted twice.

i would've updated earlier but i got distracted by tommy's and various dvds from eon mckai and skeet on mischa's favorite indie/punk rock naked girls site, burning angel(nsfw)

Apr 14, 2005

george constanza status part 2

either i have nothing to say or i'm saving all the things i have to say for another day. you make the call.

anybody else catch tyra banks' psychobilly freak out/meltdown/panic attack on last night's "america's next top model"? the thing left me shell shocked, like that homeless dude who was leaving a taping of "politically incorrect with bill maher" and just kept on muttering, "the guy just went off on some lady for the whole time" with his eyes bugging out, shaking his head.

it even left up and coming actress, camilla belle shook, mobb deep style. we're all scared of tyra banks as if we're some half way crooks. scared to pose, scared to be fierce.

i mean the thing just felt like that scene from carnal knowledge where nicholson just loses it on anna-marget, you know, but like replace the feelings of marriage with the frustration that is bound to come from baby sitting some little snotty nose kid for a weekend.

i think everybody needed to listen to that squek e clean/karen o slow jawn to calm the nerves.

in case you missed it, its bound to show up on: best week ever, e!'s the soup, jimmy kimmel and well, basically any show obessesed with popular culture.

related, it's really weird, but for some reason, i'm on the email list for that squek e clean guy's dj gigs and like i never leave the house. not to be bragging, i'm just confused, that's all.

Apr 13, 2005

what exactly is so bad about jc chasez that everybody looks so embarrased when they're around him? i mean, does eva longoria's publicist say she's not specificly with j.c., so she won't seem patheic? and that monet girl from "8 simple rules" looks as if she just got punk'd or something.

does jc not have any people skills whatsoever? does he not brush his teeth? no deodorent?

hello tomorrow

after watching one episode of mtv's meet the barkers, i've decided that we need to call social services on the barker family because they are unfit parents. i'm sorry and unfornately, the above photo does not illsturate my point, but never the less, travis barker is allergic to sleeves on his shirts. honestly, a man who can't wear a simple cotton piece to cover up some arms is just not fit to raise a child. now, if travis barker was either a weightlifter or if he was constantly working or if he was an nj guido high on ecstasy, then i'd understand the lack of sleeves, but he's just showing off some bad tatts. you know, it's just a waste of material to buy a t-shirt and cut the sleeves off it, if even if you owe your clothing company or not. i mean, if he wants to cruise around, show off his boney body and ink, then he should look into wearing tank tops on a regular basis. basically, it's the same thing cept tank tops were designed to show off the arms more than a shirt that has been cutted to down the thigh, cause that's where the shants start doing their job.

another thing, travis barker is forcing his lifestyle on the child. did they ask him if he wants a mohawk? does the baby realize that a mohawk is no longer a symbol of rebellion, a fuck you to the system, and actually being punk, but instead it's a symbol used by ad excs and desperate celebrities to be hip, cool and edgy. maybe, the child won't even be into punk rock, maybe he'll be a big fan of high school sports and doing well in school. yet sadly, due to pressure from his father, the child will drop out after the tenth grade and start up his own horrible band. can you imagine the scene, travis barker knocks on his son's door, angrly asking what he's listening and the son says he's listening to the beatles and travis gets really upset, breaks the cd and forces his son to listen to like gbh or something. this child's rebellion will be against rebel music, sadly.

although, britney spears & k fed can force feed whatever lifestyle they want onto their child cause you know it's bound to be funny.

back to the barkers for a minute, seriously, this show and the new season of i want a famous face and basically every other show on right now is just not cutting it. bring back trey, lc, stephen, kirstin, lo, talan, okay. bring back my super sweet 16, actually edit an episode of road rules/real world challenge around jamie chung for once, throw ashlee simpson off a cliff, just please do something interesting.

Apr 12, 2005

almost crimes

some say hottest girl evs, well since last saturday morning. while others believe she should be the new vanna white. and some are just wondering if she'll holla at a dude (myspace.com/skeetonmischa). or at least have a friend holla at a dude (once again, myspace.com/skeetonmischa) and say, "yeah, she's way out of your league. stick to the girls who never grew out of their junior high riding horse phase. you're gonna be miserable for the rest of your life, if you even try.".

aicn has trailers for new takeshi miike and new larry clark for y'all. i'd watch the larry clark stuff because it just makes you want to watch the warriors since you know, larry clark films never get released in america. although, the same can be said about takeshi miike films, but that trailer is really creepy and may actually get american distrubtion.

still feeling cold about that latest daft punk album, music for robots has an ear delicious french house jawn here for y'all to enjoy.

romero's land of the dead out this summer instead of october; all the zombie nuts are gonna starting waiting in line now

i must an extend a 'shame you' to saturday night live. how can you only do one joke about pat o'brien? i mean, they didn't have to do a skit with pat o'brien in his underwear, with the sniffles making phone calls, they could've gone the route of what happens if pat o'brien dialed the wrong number and constantly left nasty voice mails on somebody else's voicemail. it would've been perfect for last week's snooze-o-rama with cameron diaz as the host and cameos by jimmy fallon & drew barrymore. you see, you got your pat, your bestys and your mystery women and insert people peeing their pants from laughter. yet, what do they do instead? the barry gibb talk show. i have no forkin' clue as to who barry gibb is, i assume he was in the bee gees and wasn't he the one that passed away recently? i'm just so amazed about how modern and current those writers cause they really socked it to some disco dude. i mean, who's next? john delorean? i came to expect that type of bullshit from mad tv, but the fact is this, mad tv is getting to be a bit more cutting edge, which is sad. i mean, it's mad tv, but at least, they do their reoccuring sketchs like maybe three times a year, not trotting it every two weeks to die a horrible, unfunny death IE debbie downer (it was a one time only sketch; learn to let go)

although, that one photo of tina fey when she looked like that lady from le tigre who looks a dude was rather funny.

seperate at birth: marcus,, the round table pizza puppet and franklin from "arrested development".

somewhat due to the marginal success of "trippin" and the overt phoneness of "mee the barkers," i've come up with a reality show pitch that mtv will totally have to buy. combining "pimpin' my ride" and the absolute boredom of "trippin," i give you, "poolin'," a show in which four celebrities or three celebrities and one regular person basically all car pool together for one week in a toyota prius, that has been totally pimped out, natch. you know, it's about how can we all help save the environment and save money by sharing a ride together. for the pilot, the cast will be myself, huell howser, marcia cross and eva green. then insert the drama known as huell's annoyning stories about californian gold as we move inch down sunset blvd on a saturday night and forgetting to pick up marcia after her pilates class, and my comical romantic advances towards eva green, that undoubtley leave me left stranded somewhere in malibu, kicking rocks. it's got hit written over all it. i mean, fights over listening to howard stern in the morning instead of ryan seacrest; ways to drive the car. well, probably it'd be boring, but at least it'd be more interesting than "trippin" and a bit realier than "meet the barkers".

so of us are really good with names of people. we remember them pretty easily or at least we try hard to remember names or the person does something that helps us remember their name. then there are situations like the one i was recently in. for what seems like two months now, i've been friendly with a person who happens to be in four of my five classes this particular semester at school. basically, i see this person every day i'm on campus, so of course, we're bound to exchange pleasentries and talk about the mid term in class a or the paper due in class b next week, and for the life of me, i couldn't remember this person name. i didn't even believe she even told me her name, but here's the thing, she always works in my name into conversations. it's like: "how was your weekend, doug?", etc. so i'm talking with this person, watching movies with this person and i have no clue about her name, yet she's throwing my name all around like she's playing frisbee golf.

it should be noted, i rarely say the names of people when i talk to them. frankly, the only time i say anybody's name is when i'm asking for them on the telephone or i'm talking about them with somebody else. here's the deal, if i look at you when i'm talking to you, i believe i don't need to say your name.

so flash back to last week, i'm outside of class, talking with basically what amounts to a mystery woman when some other dude comes up and says he's in a class that she's in and wanted to borrow some notes. this guy introduces himself to the girl and vice versa, she finally says her name. so now, i know her name, yet here's the problem: it's been two months of me not saying her name and if i start busting it out all of a sudden, it'll seem fishy. you know, it's not something i can throw out causally. it'll be awkward if i start use to her name within the confines of our conversations.

the only good is that if she says something about how i don't even know her name, i can pull her bullshit card and say what it is.

Apr 11, 2005


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it feels like i've been writing about working on my friend, robin brown's latest opus, johnny benson's adventures in the blogosphere for months on end. from the day that i learn robin's film was going to have a character that would be in part inspired by your humble narrator, i was a bit excited, but i quickly started to worry about casting. you know who can they get to play me? since, i don't act, i made the casting suggestion of 'a jude law type trapped in the body of a young dustin hoffman,' yet i think with the casting choice they went with the character, carl. adam, the actor, did a pretty nice job.

also, it's just such a surreal feeling to be on set and hearing an actor say a catch phrase of mine or at least, a catch phrase i tried to start or at least, co opted from vice magazine, then tried to make it my own and the best part is that it sounds better out of an actor's mouth than my own mouth. if anything, working on this film has made me want to get back to my long gestating script and work on it over the summer (only if i could find the copy of it with notes); it's been an inspiring process.

so please take a moment out of your day, to watch the trailer for johnny benson's adventures in the blogosphere here . you know you want to. it's a movie with cute girls wearing shirts that say, "my blog is better than yours". it has an excellent james murphy tune in it. it's sorta like david fincher meets wes anderson. so check it out and send it to all of your friends.

if you really liked it, holla at robin yourself at bento productions and tell him that you want him to direct your band's next video for lots of money.

to be read after you viewed the trailer aka p.a. commentary
-did you see my cameo? hint: look for the hair and a mike mills graphic.
-did you see the hot girls?
-the shots that looked kinda like the ipod commercials/the openning credits for lynch's mullohand drive, that's when i played ciara's "goodies" on my cell phone to get the actress dancing.
-the scene where johnny was running down the street; some super nice family came out of their house and gave us the greatest lemonade i ever had and famous amos cookies.

wayne brady's gangsta rap pool party

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perhaps it was a lack of sleep or what, but as i watched pop star jojo host mtv's fake id club special, i realized that jojo is actually a robot. she's the hip hop version of vickie from "small wonder." the way she talks, it's as if she hates periods and commas, so all the words run together and without any emotional response. it's pure and simple syntax for jojo, but her programmers built an affected accent chip, so she sounds 'hood'.

speaking of mtv, have you guys seen the new dating show, "next", yet? i dunno whose casting this show, but those kids need to head over to lens crafters or something because i haven't seen a more motley group of young people since the pie eating contest in stand by me. you know, i thought mtv was the home of the hot, young and sexy but after watching an episode of this show, i'm starting to think that music television is the clubhouse for homely and fugly. and it's doublely worse for me because these daters are representing my neck of the woods and i don't want the rest of the world thinking california has hit an ugly streak. it's simply not true; i just hung out with a out of control girl and a dude who most ladies would consider to be attractive, just the other day (of course, you can always get your daily hottie fix from the snake).

yet, here's the thing, as i watched "next" last friday, the girl who was on a date with the five dudes was somebody i knew. while it was not necessarily the first time i saw somebody i've met or knew on a dating show, for example, on an episode of "dismissed," an exotic dancer that performed at a house party was featured on an episode and former laker great, derek fisher cameo'ed on the date and said the girl was hot, which oddly made me proud. you know, to realize that myself and a world champion basketball player have the same taste in women. yet, the thing with this particular episode of "next" was that the girl was a person i've hung out with a couple of times and it was always bad news bears. she just had this sleazy vibe and i dunno, the mood of the evening just went away when she came to hang out. so as she came onto the show and said she was a swimsuit model, i feel on the floor, laughing. simply cause people have taken photos of you with a bikini on doesn't automatically make you a swimsuit model. yet, the ultra deluxe super whammy, pee in my pants funny moment was when the rejected daters all dissed the girl and called her a butter face. i mean, these guys were a bunch of bros and generally it's believed that bros have no standard or sense of taste; you know these are the guys who'll say there's no hot girls from england, yet hello, sienna miller. so these guys should be jumping up and down for the chance to get with a 'swimsuit model' yet they're like "nah, dude the body might be nice, but the whole picture aint worth my time"

another thing about the show, "next" is that they need to take the show a bit further out in the southern california area. there is more to see than just the santa monica promenade. it's interesting for about like five minutes, but you can't reallly leave since it took like two hours to find a parking spot in that one structure where every spot seems like it was made only for compact cars. the promenade is not that hot. why not take the kids out on dates to riverside and have them go to a meth lab and make drugs or go to the mall of orange and play with the puppies and eat some dippin' dots.

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since when did ashlee simpson start looking like ozzy osbourne? man, touring just destroys you. be on the watch for the next tour, when ashlee starts sniffing ants off the ground with nikki sixx.

i've oddly become quite obessesed with this site over the past couple of days; maybe it's cause you can look at peoples goofy prom photos like these. [via ultragrrrl]

you know, since the weather has been getting a bit warmer over the past couple of weeks and will hopefully continue to become warmer, only marks the start of the windows down, music up driving season. a grand time to work upon the farmer tan or if you're talented the one arm is tanner than the other one tan. but i'm in a bit of a pickle about this time, only because i worry that the music i got in my car is not exactly 'tough' enough for this time of the year. i just dread the moment when i'm stopped at a light, blasting out fischerspooner and pull up to a car of construction guys or worse a car full of high school girls. fischerspooner isn't tough, but nor do i want to drive around, listening to stuff that is tough because generally tough music is horrible music. sure, there are some grace music, they could go either way with other drivers with their windows down. you know, like a bloc party or a beck, but when listening to bloc party, i worry that the moment i hit a red light, some car full of hipsters is gonna pull up right next to me and the song, "banquet" will be blasting and those cool kids will think that i listen to bloc party only for that one song, which can't be further from the truth, but i can't say to them, i like the whole album, not just the song played on kroq.

and i can't challenge the hipsters on their musical knowledge of bloc party. i can't ask them about the band while they pre judge me. i can't yell, listen to this dudes and play some random cd then ask, "do you know who is this? how hip are you, now? you paid too much for jeans!" then speed away without telling them and they'd be like, 'maybe, we should give up this charade and stop wearing three t-shirts and jeans in 90 degree weather'.

happy belated 21st birfday to mandy moore. even if she can legally drink, i still find it extremely hard to see her going to a bar and having a couple of drinks, let alone, getting on top of tables, dancing, and demanding that they play "uptown girls" by billy joel. it aint just happin'.

if anybody could hook me up with a p.a. gig or at least the chance to be a fly on the wall of the writer's room of nick's "zoey 101". i am not the show's biggest fan, but from the one episode, i watched, i was just amazed by all of the inside jokes that were undoubtlely snuck into the show or at least snuck in by the production design and prop staff of the show. i just want to know how it's possible to continue reinventing the wheel known as tween sitcoms; hasn't it all been done before? so doesn't the boredom of basically writing the same show over and over again with the same basic moral message undoubtly lead to a passing reference to the hell's angels.

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and finally, can "arrested development" get any better during it's home stretch? if it's the final run, it's gonna be pretty shitters since "arrested" is pretty much a live action version of "the simpsons" and with "the simpsons" going down the poop shoot quicker than a bad meal from taco bell and whatever lame pitch seth mcfarlane pulls out of his ass that fox buys, we really could use the bluth family. dag, zach braff was hiliarious. [image via the op]

Apr 8, 2005

it's hard to start a car when you're not in park

imagine the ping pong game i witnessed the other day. on one side of the table, there was an out of hand hot girl who seems like she'd be a bit stuck up but when you talk to her, she's really nice, funny and magically pulls out copies of sympathy for mr. vengeance out of her backpack and then on the other side of the table, we had a girl whose current style icon is karen o., yet it wasn't too terriblely over the top with it; imagine as if like karen o. made casual wear for urban outfitters. so these two girls are battling back and forth, well not really battling, but more or less, they were just talking with each other, but they were talking about dance parties. maybe it was one of those moments where you had to be there to fully apperciate everything; but frankly, i belive you can substitue your own personal office/school/coffee shop/mall related crushes into the scerino and just imagine them talking about something you love alot. me, i like dance parties, so it didn't hurt that those two were talking about dance parties, but you know, if it works out for you, maybe the girls were talking about how bummed they are cause march madness is over and they just loved going to the bar and drinking pitchers upon pitchers of ice cold beer; you know, whatever waxes your car.

side note to that story, after dealing with that hotness, in class we had to watch beat kinato's boiling point. could a better day ever be planned? geez, if i knew college was like this, i would've gone alot sooner. it's about as much as fun as what i would assume having the dip set as your car pool buddies would be.

does anybody else believe that matthew mcconaughey did sahara cause he thought that the world needed a stoner version of indiana jones? for my money, the thing looks like his character from dazed & confused running around, blowing shit up. oh, the ideas that come to us during pantless bongo jam sessions or some like to call them, 'drum circles'.

steven soderbergh please casting george clooney in all of your films; it's okay to cast other actors even if clooney is your producing partner. branch out a bit and maybe try a bit hard to woe daniel day lewis to work with you. i mean, isn't daniel day lewis the actor that you really want to work with? so why is clooney always the second choice? why not try an ed norton out? whatever happened to him? or what about a clive owen? he's pretty good; did you see him in closer? fast forward through everything in that film but his scenes, in particular the ones with natalie portman. i mean, honestly for an oscar winner, your casting decisions are pretty similiar to those of a first year film student; i'm gonna ask my friend to be my lead cause we made videos together back in junior high.

related, i read in the la times the other day, that soderbergh is making some quickie film in the middle of nowhere, casting people he sees in the d-q. so i'm guessing schizopolis 2?

Apr 6, 2005

george constanza status

frankly, i've got nothing to say today, but has anybody else seen hiliary duff during her guest host stint on the view? i just saw her during an interview with jane fonda and she was just staring off into space, wondering if she's gonna go to the marc jacobs store and get some chinese food or if she'll just cruise around the city and maybe grab a peanut butter sandwich at that one place that only sells peanut butter sandwiches. hiliary duff is on some 'holly hunter in the piano type of shit.

Apr 5, 2005

beverly hills

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dude, penelope cruz will sleep with anything for a little bit of buzz or at least, matthew mcgounhey really, i mean really let himself go.

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openning day is a mixed blessing, i guess. yeah, it's great that baseball is back, but here's the rub, on the way home from school, i have to drive right by angels stadium. traffic will continue to be awful, so i'm not sweating that as much, but my problem is this, what if somebody hits a home run so far that it crashes through one of the windows in my car, causing me to freak out and probably get into a accident. with the rampant use of roids in the major leagues these days, i even have more to worry about. (i'm not impling that vlad the implier uses roids; dude is beyond nice, read here)

i think that probably my biggest fear in regards to driving is to be attacked by an out of control ball. it probably stems from the one time i was walking to the bank and these kids playing soccer kicked their ball over the fence, so this guy picked it up and kicked it over, but it hit the fence, bounced back and hit the guy in the face. then there was that time, when those same kids kicked the ball over again and it hit a moving car and bmw owner went nuts, but that's not really my story to tell.

i really want to like hot hot heat, but they're a terrible live band, beyond awful and secondly, the singer smiles way too much. i haven't seen this much smiling since george michaels was pracing about in short shorts, so hot hot heat fans be on the look out for steve bays singing about jitterbugs and talking about how he never wants dance again. also, why can't he put his microphone in a mic stand while he plays the keyboard? i'm sure the constant struggle of putting back and removing the mic from its stand is rather taxing, but you know, if he wants to prance around the stage in his dolphin shorts, then just be a singer and get some dude to be a touring keyboardist.

Apr 4, 2005

knuck if you buck

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i must say that the highlight of my spring break had to have been last friday night as i played 'knuck if you buck' and 'goodies' ringtones as some girl who said that she was photographed by terry richardson for japanese vogue danced around behind a green screen. sure, it might've been a bit repeatenious to hear that 12 second sample of that crime mob classic over and over again, but just the fact people were getting down to a ringtone is merely a sign for things to come. you got your regular hip hop djs and your dance music djs, your mash up kids, ipod djs and now make way for the ringtone dj who'll drop about 11 seconds of hot ish known as the chorus from "the final countdown," that'll get everybody screaming, "redial!"

also, i have to extend a rather large fuck you to the woman who sat in front of me when i saw sin city. no matter how early you leave to grab that perfect seat at the movies, some lemonhead will ruin it for you, unless it's like the arclight, then some geeky kid will ruin your experince (when i said center, i meant center of the aisle, not the center row, at the end of it). so flash forward to the reveal of carla cugino's bombs over baghdad and this lady stands up and blocks that exact portion of the screen. you know, most people move rather quickly out of the aisle when they have to go the bathroom, but this bitch stood there for like five seconds before she even moved out of the way, even asking if her mondo retardo husband wanted something. i paid 8 bucks to see movie star boobies, not the flabby ass of some 40 year old. then at the end of the movie, her and her husband who was rocking sweat pants, by the way, just stood there blocking the screen while i'm trying to watch the end credits.

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if i were a talented person, i'd write some clever chris rock esque bit about how white people hate white trash the most and it would send me on a rocket ship to fameland where i'd have no problems seeing carla cugino's boobies ever again.

the only nice thing i'll say about jessica alba in sin city is this, with digital projection, you can really tell that she has great skin. the meat of the film: "the hard good bye" with mickey rourke and "the big fat kill" with steve aoki's sister is amazing, but the bruce willis/jessica alba stuff seems a bit phoned in, with say the exception of jessica alba's stripey dance. quite possiblely, i have finally realized that while being extremely attractive, jessica alba is only a maraginal decent actress, if not a smidge worse. perhaps for her birthday, i'll get her the larry moss acting book and see what does.

the garbage pail kids movie, this summer on dvd; watch the trailer here and sorta feel weird the rest of your day.

some may say best tat eves, while others may just say why wasn't she an extra on the day we spent like ten hours at chain reaction, working on a movie because there'd probably be an answer to the question of why, which would be rather lackluster and disappointing and make some say, 'i liked it better when i didn't know.'

related: her friend, forever will be an ad for paul frank. sure, i like the scruvy logo and all, i even got the scruvy wallet, but to be carrying that with you into your 30s, let alone, your late 20s, i dunno. i just hope paul frank gives her some free shit cause homegirl has earned it.

further related: i've lamented about the possibilities of running into some person i wrote about from that cobra snake site, before and the whole what do i situation surrounding it. anyways, flash forward to a convo i'm having with somebody who lives in la and just turned 21 and the whole nightlife and of course, have you been on the cobra snake and of course, the person said yes, cause she was a babe; then i felt weird as i said, 'yeah, i probably wrote a caption for your picture on my blog. that's what i do.' so i've faced the situation head on and i came out of it with the desire to take a shower cause i felt so dirty.

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does anybody else see this creepy guy ever time they go onto safari, too? the super long mullet, creepy stache, and those cold eyes just staring at you as your internerd time begins. makes you want to stop using the internerd all together, but then there's the porn, so you know.

i assume that a majority of the world does not share the same pain that i have when it comes to "et on mtv". for a while, the show used to be the home to cheese puff interviews and maria menounos, good stuff, right? now, that she has left the show to be on the one show that makes me feel like i'm so out of the loop because i don't watch it, "one tree hill", there's a replacement named ryan devlin. i assume that ryan devlin is probably a nice person off camera, but the fact is this, he's the second coming of ryan seacrest or at least, he attended the seacrest school of television presenting where they teach you to the exactly, precise way to make your hair look as if you've just woke up and which highlights are right for you. the tv world does not need another seacrest, nor do we need another maria menounos, so i'm just saying to the producers, let's go on breakdown express or now casting and put out a notice for a hot girl or scoop up lauren from "the starlet"; she's got a cute vibe and probably won't have any problems with a telepromter. i mean, we can try a bit harder than the first guy who walked by in a ben sherman shirt and diesel jeans.

related: "one tree hill" i feel like i'm out of the loop because whenever i watch "trl" or something, the guest is always somebody i've never heard and usually they're from the show "one tree hill" or a "one tree hill" related show on the wb. the vjs act as if "one tree hill" is the single most important show in the whole wide world and it makes me so old because i'm not on a name recogination basis with bethany joy lenz. although, it should be noted, that even if i was in high school, i'd still probably not even know who bethany joy lenz is and what she did to make her famous.

and finally, the mork & mindy movie is on tonight and i wonder how they're gonna potray robin williams' drug problem. will be it in the traditional of good old after school specials or will it be in that sexy, don simpson style?

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god bless g.o.b. and franklin, but please fox keep on pumpin' out those that 70s shows. [image via the op]

Apr 1, 2005

feel good inc.

i'd have something to say, but i'm still in bit of a daze after spending my thursday, driving down pch with the windows down and the prefuse bumping and staring at terry richardson photos at a museum.

to me, i found it rather surreal to be in a museum, watching a spike jonze short or looking at a richardson photo with his wang chung all over the place and it to be considered art. some dude who was looking at the exhibit said to his gal pal, "hey, that's the dude from vice magazine," which sorta upset me. you know, i wish i would've said, "terry richardson is more than the dude from vice magazine, he's the guy whose conning goofy kids with digital cameras into believing that they could have their work in books and museums in new york when we all know that they can't even take a picture of their dog. dude is a genius." if you're in the area and it's not may 16th, check out "beautiful losers" at ocma. you can watch mike mills' shorts & videos all at the same time. word to wise, security guards there sorta creeped me out cause they followed me around stuff and watched what i did. do i look like thomas crown?

joel silver is completely focused, right now. scamming mtv into doing a documentary on the production of his latest teen horror flick with the season finale being on the night before the film's release. brilliant, brilliant marketing. i gotta say this though, too much paris hilton, not enough miss thighs for my taste. paris is a cold bogger on my paper plate while elisha cuthbert is hot snot; i guess it will be like watching an episode of "desperate housewives," you sorta bear with all of the boring stuff to get to the marica cross stuff.

why is the kid from mean creek wearing the same shirt as i wore back in senior year of high school?

if you wanna holla at me via myspace, you can reach me at myspace.com/skeetonmischa; so you know blogger groupies or random people who read this mess, get at me.

doesn't anybody else get frustrated by those best buy ads where the guy says you can control the black eyed peas with your own hands? cause i really wish that was the case, cause i'd hit the delete button and adios amigos.

don't forget, if you're gonna go see sin city this weekend, make sure you see it digitally projected. so when you walk out of the theater, most likely disapointed, you can say, it's at least the way the filmmakers wanted it projected.

and one last thing, we're really big fans of jimmy fallon nowadays. just can't wait to see fever pitch and hope that the next trip to amoeba will score us a used copy of his comedy cd, "the bathroom wall" and the rest of this evening will be spent watching his best of dvd and taxi. he's just so funny; man, i wish i was as clever as he is, then maybe i'd go somewhere with my life.

and oh yeah, lcd soundsystem with m.i.a. at the el rey tickets go on sale tomorrow morning; pump your brakes and prove to james murphy that la loves him, please, thanks. i think we can do it, sell out the el rey. shouldn't be too hard.