knuck if you buck
i must say that the highlight of my spring break had to have been last friday night as i played 'knuck if you buck' and 'goodies' ringtones as some girl who said that she was photographed by terry richardson for japanese vogue danced around behind a green screen. sure, it might've been a bit repeatenious to hear that 12 second sample of that crime mob classic over and over again, but just the fact people were getting down to a ringtone is merely a sign for things to come. you got your regular hip hop djs and your dance music djs, your mash up kids, ipod djs and now make way for the ringtone dj who'll drop about 11 seconds of hot ish known as the chorus from "the final countdown," that'll get everybody screaming, "redial!"
also, i have to extend a rather large fuck you to the woman who sat in front of me when i saw sin city. no matter how early you leave to grab that perfect seat at the movies, some lemonhead will ruin it for you, unless it's like the arclight, then some geeky kid will ruin your experince (when i said center, i meant center of the aisle, not the center row, at the end of it). so flash forward to the reveal of carla cugino's bombs over baghdad and this lady stands up and blocks that exact portion of the screen. you know, most people move rather quickly out of the aisle when they have to go the bathroom, but this bitch stood there for like five seconds before she even moved out of the way, even asking if her mondo retardo husband wanted something. i paid 8 bucks to see movie star boobies, not the flabby ass of some 40 year old. then at the end of the movie, her and her husband who was rocking sweat pants, by the way, just stood there blocking the screen while i'm trying to watch the end credits.
if i were a talented person, i'd write some clever chris rock esque bit about how white people hate white trash the most and it would send me on a rocket ship to fameland where i'd have no problems seeing carla cugino's boobies ever again.
the only nice thing i'll say about jessica alba in sin city is this, with digital projection, you can really tell that she has great skin. the meat of the film: "the hard good bye" with mickey rourke and "the big fat kill" with steve aoki's sister is amazing, but the bruce willis/jessica alba stuff seems a bit phoned in, with say the exception of jessica alba's stripey dance. quite possiblely, i have finally realized that while being extremely attractive, jessica alba is only a maraginal decent actress, if not a smidge worse. perhaps for her birthday, i'll get her the larry moss acting book and see what does.
the garbage pail kids movie, this summer on dvd; watch the trailer here and sorta feel weird the rest of your day.
some may say best tat eves, while others may just say why wasn't she an extra on the day we spent like ten hours at chain reaction, working on a movie because there'd probably be an answer to the question of why, which would be rather lackluster and disappointing and make some say, 'i liked it better when i didn't know.'
related: her friend, forever will be an ad for paul frank. sure, i like the scruvy logo and all, i even got the scruvy wallet, but to be carrying that with you into your 30s, let alone, your late 20s, i dunno. i just hope paul frank gives her some free shit cause homegirl has earned it.
further related: i've lamented about the possibilities of running into some person i wrote about from that cobra snake site, before and the whole what do i situation surrounding it. anyways, flash forward to a convo i'm having with somebody who lives in la and just turned 21 and the whole nightlife and of course, have you been on the cobra snake and of course, the person said yes, cause she was a babe; then i felt weird as i said, 'yeah, i probably wrote a caption for your picture on my blog. that's what i do.' so i've faced the situation head on and i came out of it with the desire to take a shower cause i felt so dirty.
does anybody else see this creepy guy ever time they go onto safari, too? the super long mullet, creepy stache, and those cold eyes just staring at you as your internerd time begins. makes you want to stop using the internerd all together, but then there's the porn, so you know.
i assume that a majority of the world does not share the same pain that i have when it comes to "et on mtv". for a while, the show used to be the home to cheese puff interviews and maria menounos, good stuff, right? now, that she has left the show to be on the one show that makes me feel like i'm so out of the loop because i don't watch it, "one tree hill", there's a replacement named ryan devlin. i assume that ryan devlin is probably a nice person off camera, but the fact is this, he's the second coming of ryan seacrest or at least, he attended the seacrest school of television presenting where they teach you to the exactly, precise way to make your hair look as if you've just woke up and which highlights are right for you. the tv world does not need another seacrest, nor do we need another maria menounos, so i'm just saying to the producers, let's go on breakdown express or now casting and put out a notice for a hot girl or scoop up lauren from "the starlet"; she's got a cute vibe and probably won't have any problems with a telepromter. i mean, we can try a bit harder than the first guy who walked by in a ben sherman shirt and diesel jeans.
related: "one tree hill" i feel like i'm out of the loop because whenever i watch "trl" or something, the guest is always somebody i've never heard and usually they're from the show "one tree hill" or a "one tree hill" related show on the wb. the vjs act as if "one tree hill" is the single most important show in the whole wide world and it makes me so old because i'm not on a name recogination basis with bethany joy lenz. although, it should be noted, that even if i was in high school, i'd still probably not even know who bethany joy lenz is and what she did to make her famous.
and finally, the mork & mindy movie is on tonight and i wonder how they're gonna potray robin williams' drug problem. will be it in the traditional of good old after school specials or will it be in that sexy, don simpson style?
god bless g.o.b. and franklin, but please fox keep on pumpin' out those that 70s shows. [image via the op]