the thing about miranda july's me and you and everybody we know is its parts are greater than its whole. miranda july should stick to making movies about children because they are the only interesting characters in the film. for as bizzare as alot of the scenes involving kids felt autheic and real, which is rather hard to pull off. from her performance, i could tell that miranda july is still firmly in touched with her child side, but it should be noted, that miranda july should hang up the acting hat. for me and my dollar, her performance felt like she was napoleon dynamite's long lost sister.
while the kids stuff felt real, i gotta call bullshit on the scene where the two girls say that their favorite music is cody chesnutt music. maybe if the film was made in 2003, i'd believe it, but even then it's a bit of strentch. i mean, that was some serious over night hype. here today, gone today.
although it should be noted, i was preparing for myself to say that the fire in the building next to the movie theaters was vastly more interesting than the film, but i was wrong. a fire that had 4 or 5 fire trucks out wasn't as interesting as the movie. i think that it was weird that the theater didn't stop its showings because of the fire. that's probably my number one movie fear, what happens when a natural disaster occurs while watching a movie? like if there's an earthquake, does the movie stop or do we keep it going because we're southern californians and you know, fuck the earthquake, i'm watching herbie: fully loaded.
my second movie watching fear is what if somebody whose sitting behind me and it's a scary movie and during a scary part, the person behind me grabs my shoulders and i freak out and if i had popcorn, all of it would be on the people around me.
you know me, i love me some "road rules" angela aka angela trimbur. i mean, i don't think anybody would reading this mess if it wasn't for her. but here's the thing, i must be slipping on my babe watch cause i totally slept on the launch of angela trimbur's website (probably too distracted by babes like this). yet, here's my problem with her portfilo, everybody has a shot like the one above. it's a portofolio cliche. you know flip the script up a bit. have a shot of you sitting on a toliet, drinking a corona. i know somebody who may or may not have a similar image of your humble narrator doing that.
related, i don't understand why the makers of loaded, which apparently is a terrifying look behind the orange curtain, aren't heavily promoting the fact that road rules angela is in their movie doing strippey dances. i mean at least cut a 30 second spot of b-roll of her doing some moves on the pole with masta ace's "sittin on chrome" playing in the background.
and on the real, if you want to hear real terrifying tales from behind the orange curtain, then read oc idiots. and one of these days, i'll write something for that site, but i'm super busy with other things right now.
gotta extend a fuck you over to mlb and their whole vote on the final 2 all stars thing. yeah, i hate derek jeter and i never been impressed by anything he's ever done. to me, derek jeter is the tim duncan of baseball. everybody says he's great, but i have yet to see it. personally, i wish i could vote on which professional baseball player gets to sent to the island on "lost" and becomes food for the invisiable monster, cause i'd vote for derek jeter like 8 million times. why can't i vote for a player on my team? yeah, it'd be like a few thousand people, but chone figgins needs to be at the all star playing twenty different positions each inning. what can derek jeter do? talk about what's it like to have sex with mariah carey? boring.
and finally to pull off the hat trick of spitting in peoples' salads, like 6 years ago, mtv's that 70s' house would've been gangbusters, but hasn't the world moved past 70s nostalgia as well as 80s nostalgia? i'm sure the show might be interesting, but when i see bil dwyer's name as the host, it's time to head for the hills. can't mtv just show the second season of "laguna beach" already? i need to live my awesome o.c. lifestyle through teenaged kids who live about 15 minutes away from my house. i can't have a life unless i know if l.c. and stephen hooked while at school in san fran. how am i supposed to deal without knowing about the new drama about laguna beach high with kristen as a senior? i need to know if morgan finally came out and professed her love to christinia; i don't need to see goofy kids deal with polyster and 8 track tapes.
on the topic of mtv, johanna from the new real world is delayed reaction hot. has that ever happened to you? like there's somebody in a class of yours or office or softball team, you know whatever, and like you think the person is sorta all right looking, but then a few weeks later, you see a photo of them and you're like they're sorta of hot? wait, did that even make any sense?
i think that bet is going to show the full "trapped in the closet" saga tonight at 10p. way better than a bunch of unattractive weiner kids talkin' about how they wanna hook up with the only house babe that doesn't have southie cooties. and by way, southie cooties, i mean that weiner kid from boston. that's why real world austin is horrible, it's told through his point of view and guess what? he's rather dull and boring.
and finally, i said something about being mad at chuck taylor aka the game. i don't know if i have enough time to explain why i'm mad at the game, perhaps tomorrow, i'll go into. but i'll say this, why didn't he buy the beat, "bandanas" first? if you haven't heard the beat, it's on "back like crooked crack 2," mixtape by juelz santana. but for the game, that's probably the most perfect beat with an amazing chorus. "he wore a red bandana". if that doesn't describe a rapper from compton, then i don't know what does. or the game should at least get on it if juelz uses it for his full length.