waves that never break
well, to be honest, people, the past few days in skeetville have not been good at all. actually, it's the worst i've ever felt in my life. my dog, nelson, who was 14 years old, passed away. it's hard for me to talk about it because i don't want to upset other people or you know, ruin their day with what i'm dealing with. it's good share, but at the same time, i feel like this isn't the forum for me to share my grief and frustrations and over all, saddness. yet, if i don't get out these feelings, i figure i'll blow up somewhere else.
its hard for me to be at home because all i know and all i remember of being at home, is having nelson sleeping in the corner or running around. and when i leave the house, i briefly escape those thoughts, but when i'm on my way back home, i start to remember how she'd always be there. she was the constant in my life and i always thought she'd out live me, but i just don't know what to do anymore. do i sit around and listen to all the sad songs on my ipod or do i just try to deal with what i'm going through and hope over time, i'll become whole again.
the passig of nelson wasn't a sudden event, she had been in declining health for a little over a year now, but no matter how much you prepare yourself for it, it still hurts and feels as if she died suddenly.
understandablely, i'll be taking the next couple of weeks off. while i apperciate the regular readers and the pop ins, i don't know if i'll be able to make fun of the laguna beach kids just right now.