&t skeet on mischa: 03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005

skeet on mischa

i wouldn't have given you it if i didn't agree

Mar 30, 2005

better off dead (revised)

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brittany murphy just saw one of her neighbors and did the 'what's up' head nod to avoid an uncomfortable stop and chat.

a word to the wise, some extremely ear delicious death from above 1979 b-sides and remixes may be found here, but you gotta scroll around for a minute, but totally worth it. your humble narrator considers himself a big fool for missing out all of the local death from above 1979 shows last weekend; i just don't want to go long beach unless i'm guarnated a trip to roscoe's while in town. it's like a mildly drunk teenager on a friday night in southern california not going to del taco; it just doesn't make any sense.

um, i know it's not fun to get up early on a saturday morning, let alone getting up early during spring break. honestly, two days, i've been up by 8, waiting for hours upon hours for repair dudes to show up; when they eventually show up, i'm on the computer watching the trailer for the garbage pail kids movie. but anyways, what i'm saying is that a friend needs some people to come down to chain reaction on saturday morning at 10am; so if you have the time and want to be in a movie about myspace culture and the internerd, then come on down.

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did anybody else get a booklet when they bought the louis xiv album? i have yet to listen the album, but i'm gonna go on record that the album probably has the best album art work of the year. the bonus booklet has some more photos of karen miller in further states of undress; which leads me to ask, who is karen miller and how can i book her for a modeling job as my on campus sidekick and carpool buddy?

related, the bravery's album, although there's a couple of good tunes, the whole thing comes off as a hot hot heat record; frankly, they should change their name to luke luke warm. brandon flowers, the bravery didn't get signed because of your band; in part, probably yeah, but you gotta remember there was hot hot heat and record execs for some odd reason were doing flips over them and there was the franz.the nu wave is the new nu metal.

there's this girl at a store i frequent and it seems like every time, i'm there and she's working, she's wearing the same exact thing. sure, people who have jobs tend to wear uniforms, but this wasn't one of those spots where you had to wear a uniform; you can wear whatever you want and everytime, it's the same jacket, black tank top and jeans. i can understand why a person like me constantly wears the same thing day in and day out or at least the same pair of jeans, it's cause i wish i was a character on "the simpsons," but why is this hot girl wearing the same exact thing every day? maybe she's always crashing at her boyfriend's pad and only has one outfit there, but don't you think she would've brought over more clothes by now? or maybe she left home and said that the only thing she was gonna take was the clothes on her back, tina turner style and she's just too proud to go home and say, i need another t-shirt and this skirt. it's okay to go home and get your old clothing; it doesn't mean, you're gonna start living there again; it just means it was sorta stupid to leave with only the clothes on your back.

cush's bro has bad tase in ladies or at least what i could stomach of charlie o'connell as the bachelor and how the rules are there are no rules, which means like, there's a bunch of rules or at least rules made by caddy, over tanned, orangey skin toned, self esteem challenged girls every five minutes about who can do what and to whom. frankly, i'm waiting for an extended cameo by jerry o'connell as he helps his brother narrow the field with some help from rebecca romijin stamos o'connell.

remember that episode of "the simpsons," where homer changes his name to max power and gets invited to that party at trent steele's house and it turns out to be a bunch of yuppies trying to save the environment and this is the only way we know how, remember that one? remember how dead on accurate they were about the futililty of celebrities trying to save the environment IE ed beggley jr and his scooter that runs off his own sense of self satisfaction. okay, so that's what cameron diaz or as reggie nobble likes refer to her as cam'ron diaz's show, "trippin" is a bunch of rich people telling me that how napeal is so beautiful and wonderful and we should do all that we can to save it. yeah, that's great, it's beautiful and it's a shame and all, but i got my own problems to deal with.

remember that one guy who cried at the end of that show, "are you hot?" and they played that clip like a billion times on jimmy kimmel? you know, he was so sad because he wasn't hot enough to make it, well anyways, that guy returns to tv on bravo's "showdog moms & dads," which airs tonight, read his bio here; hopefully, he'll cry again because his dog isn't hot enough.

Mar 28, 2005

hollaback girl

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you totally know what samaire armstrong and bree turner are yelling about, two words: spring break! do you think that these two planned out their hair colors with each other; you know one is blonde for x amount of time, while the other is a brunette, so nobody would get them confused, cause i mean, look at their headshots, patty duke steez, yet i'd still want to hang out with them at some resturant owned by somebody from "that 70s show" in la.

although, wanna talk about wild? i've been off caffine for about a year or so now, and at easter lunch at albertacos, i had a couple cherry cokes. got crunked up? understatement to the max.

so the drive in totals for spring break '05, thus far:
-2 caffeinated drinks
-1 panic attack
-0 beers
-0 hot girls sightings

i must extend an adios amigo to parking lot b at school. we hardly parked in yee, but we're dreading next monday's parking nightmare.

consider us b-a-n-a-n-a-s for sleeping on how great gwen stefani's "hollaback girl" is. the downside, the video that'll probably be directed by david lachapelle with half of the budget going up his nose and his absolutely brilliant concept of those poor harajuku girls dancing around in bananas costumes on a track field with early 80s stylized high school kids or maybe the video will featuring some of that hot krumping; you know like those harajuku girls get into a dance off with some krump'ed kid. that shit is gonna be a-w-f-u-l, awful. but yeah, the song is good though.

yet, a video that plays homage to bananas in pajamas would be rather hot.

chuck klosterman on ashlee simpson and how she smacks of effort [via oh no they didn't]; related: page six six six says that ashlee simpson is dating some dude from hoobastank, so if you live by ashlee simpson & her party house with her paid friends, be on the prowl for shirtless dudes with highlighted faux hawks playing guitar on balaconys, singing awful songs or at least thats how the kids who listen to hoobastank act and their dads are dicks cause they ask you to pick up your dog's poop cause 'kids' play there even though, there's gigantic shrads of glass lying in the grass. yeah, a bit of dog poop is way worser than bleeding kids.

cameron diaz's travelogue aka celebrity road rules show, "trippin" starts tonight where her and close, personal friends go traveling around the world and doing extreme stunts and show the hilliary duff set how to take the care of the environment. my thing is this how are dmx and cameron diaz close, personal friends? i mean, drew barrymore, i understand, but dmx, not so much. i can't see cameron diaz texting dmx about going to lunch together when he's in la or when she's in yonkers. maybe, they became friends over the fondness for dogs, but i mean that's a bit of strentch. then again, they have publicists who are friends and they pitch this thing over blackberrys, starbucks and cigarette breaks. i like the idea of cameron diaz and dmx hanging out with each other, but not necessarily doing extreme stunts, maybe something like my dinner with andre style. x and cammy d rappin' about the pitfuls of celebdom, having bad skin and pretending to be federal agents.

related, a friend of mine wanted to borrow some movies from collection and he asked if i had any drew barrymore movies. i dunno why, but it was kind of creepy. not to mention, he totally messed up the dario argento section. everybody knows that suspiria goes after deep red.

you know, you'd see somebody at some thing and think that the person looks like somebody you know; like an old friend from riverside that you never see anymore because they live in riverside and who wants to make the drive out to riverside? then you ask your friend if the person looks like the old friend, and of course, they say no. so you sorta walk over towards that person to get a better look and they look nothing like that old friend at all, yet you want to get to know the new person a bit better. does that make snese? or was it like the time when me and punk rock tim thought we saw rob halford at a faint show and we yelled, 'halford' a couple of lines, then ran away.

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colter freeman's location 146 wrapped production this weekend. from what i've seen of the rough cut, shit is binoculars; yet when a majority of the cast speaks russian, you start to worry that maybe the cast is badmouthing you and if they were, how would you know? i can't speak russian, but i think i was okay because i did a good job and i was the guy who knew were the open bathroom was located.

Mar 25, 2005

he aint heavy, he's my brother


much like the rest of school, i have checked out for spring break. although, as i've previously stated, my spring break will be anything but glamorous; unless, you believe watching godard's week end like three times a day to be sexy and walking around egg shells only because i'm not sure did i link a photo of some girl in a class of mine and wrote about foxy she is. i'm rather too lazy to search through the skeet files to find an answer. the girl looked as if she was upset, like, "thanks alot, douche. now i got dudes coming up to me and saying, 'i saw you on that one blog, mischa something. you're so hot,' while i'm at the dance disaster movement show. thanks."

but as always, i throw caution to the wind.

the spring break beer count starts at 5 beers, for i have 5 beers in my fridge from like december that i orignially picked up to get drunk with at a christmas party, but at the time, i was rather sick and goofed up on cold medicine, so i figured i was bad enough as is. so that beer probably has gone bad, if beer can go bad. i'll keep y'all abreasted on my drinking habits during spring break.

this photo reminds me of late nights at albertacos, my local 24 hour mexican food place. the food is beyond amazing and the price is nice. you go in on a saturday night and you're bound to see a few red eyes and a gang of 'cool kids' just sitting there with like one burritto to spilt between them. you know, they never ate; they just drank cherry coke and smoked cigarettes outside. they never ate at all. they just brushed their bangs out of their face and lottered, yet i was scared of them because there was maybe like me and a friend and there'd be like 8 of them and they'd be wearing boots. so like albertacos was like this mixed blessing because the food was good and there could be some killer babe there, but you gotta deal with sceney little jerks who drive lowered trucks with gigantic straight edge stickers that say: "drug free" so bros would yell, "i love drugs" and these guys don't know how to order nachos. although, i like this one cause she's eating something.

p diddy's making the band: third time's a charm should be re-named battle of the streaks or beyond the highlight dome. i wish i had more to say that, but i mean, the show is just blah. you know, where's babs yelling, "let 'em fight" or that one guy sucking on his thumb; instead we got a bunch of disopable white girls with blonde & dark streaks all the while, some fat dude is yelling 'divas' every two seconds telling girls to lose weight. p. just kill the project now and focus on willmer vasquez's record.

so m night shyamalan to follow up undelicious the village with a remake of spalsh? i think defamer beat me to the punch on joke about the surprise twist ending, but i'm hopin that topherkey grace continues on that quest of being the new tom hanks and compagins to be in this film.

wong kar wai's 2046 to finally get a state side release in the fall, but if you're cool, you've already seen it, but it was on your tv screen, so it wasn't as good.

and finally, man, our babe of the week title has to be the kiss of death for cute girls on reality tv. as you see, our babe of the week for this week, the starlet's lauren got kicked off and once before, we had a girl from "project runway" as our babe of the week and she got voted off that week, too. so i'm thinking, if you got anybody on a reality show, you don't like and would be sorta believable as a babe of the week, holla at me and we together, might get her off the show.

Mar 24, 2005

hombre

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who is camilla belle and why haven't the hot cops issued a warrant for her arrest, yet?

dude, even when uncle grambo is swamped with work, he still comes through and just destroys everything: his thoughts on the terri schiavo baby mama drama

i'd say something about this whole terri schiavo thing, but one, i don't think it's my place to get all political unless it's about fixing pot holes on the 5 freeway and secondly, i can't get a grasp for the situation because whenever i see anything about it on the news, it's usuallly, on cnn in the student union without the sound on. it's just a wee bit hard to get an idea on the situation while reading wolf blitzer lips and listening to lil scrappy at the same time.

related, why won't lil scrappy be my myspace friend? i don't post unnecessary bulletins about new pictures and what not; i might post a bulletin about extra work and that's about it.

i believe the only reason why i'm watching american idol this season is for the inevetable jokes by simon cowell: "you sing about as well as paula drives" and "mikalah, you're about as much fun as a sober pat o'brien at a christmas party" of course, paula will dump water on simon and storm off crying, ryan seacrest will say that it was uncalled for, all the while, randy jackson is hiding back his laughter, muttering something about how that was not cool, cowell.

if you haven't already made the trip to your favorite record store yet to pick up the new prefuse 73 album, "surrounded by silence," do it as soon as you finish reading this, okay. now don't go and download tracks off of acquisition or soulseek, just buy the damn album. if you don't have enough money, right now, then wait to you have enough, but just buy the thing. i mean, the album artwork has a nice shoot of some girl's boobies, so you know it's got that going on for it, besides being an excellent hip hop record. thump it in your car or work out with it on your ipod, just as long as you pay money for it. it's worth it.

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and finally, some may say to much my dismay "the oc" gets picked up for a third season. so please take a good luck at josch schwartz, because dude is one of the luckiest dudes around cause his show has been rather undelicious as of late, but i have hope. i'm giving it one more chance, but not ashtanti style.

Mar 23, 2005

rise up with fists

boys and ghouls, your humble is gonna be real with you for a moment. perhaps, it was because i walk down the street with my head down or maybe cause i was wearing my camo paul frank hoodie at night, so it could've been my fault, but anyways,i was nearly hit by a car while walking to my car at school, the other night. believe you me, this isn't the first incident of being nearly hit by a car. i've almost gotten into fights with people who nearly hit with their car; well, only one time and i yelled to the guy, "please run me over, next time." but anyways, i think it was a me problem when i got nearly hit last night, i mean it couldn't have been the driver. i mean, isn't wasn't pouring last night and she was on the phone, so her full attention was focused on the road, right? the look on her face as i sorta jumped out of the way of her car was rather priceless; i can't explain it, but i have to assume that she said, "oh my gosh, i just almost hit some guy, but you know, i'm really frustrated with jordan, right now. you know, i wish we could take our relationship to the next level," or something stupid like that.

related, my father, charles reinhardt speaks on the horrors of l.a. drivers. seriously, the family that blogs together, stays together and no, we're not against women drivers.

further related, there is no greater driving tourtue than driving home in traffic with rain so heavy that you can barely see five feet in front of you and you can't listen to the new prefuse 73 album because you can't concrete on that and the road at the same time, so instead you listen to npr's "says you".

t.i. filmed a guest spot for an upcoming episode of "the oc" [via catchdubs]; so how far away are we from cameos by e-40 as the new neighbor from across the street, who will hopefully stop by the cohen household and say something to the effect of "these girls left their asses at home," but you know, in e-40 slang. honestly, i think that the show creators should write in a guest spot for kobe bryant for next season. i mean, homeboy is a resident of newport beach and maybe josh schwartz could jump on that ever super popular ripping off larry david bandwagon to spice things up.

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well, mischa b has like an annoyning, unnecessary speed bump in a supermarket parking lot style of ass; but, yeah, she left most of it at home.

i mean if my spring break wasn't next week and probably will be spent writing papers and i felt comfortable with my parking skills in la, then i'd totally track these babes down and party with 'em. although, they'd probably laugh at me and call me, 'a bro' for asking if they want to party and what not, then they'll probably leave the place with a couple of anoxeric boys with similar hair cuts, cause you know, the cool kids belong together. which leave me, talking to some girl whose really into horses cause my hair reminds her of a horse. honestly, probably the craziest my spring break will get, will probably be drinking a beer and watching robot chicken and maybe going to an art museum or amoeba

is the mia album out now or not? the xl site says it'll be out on the 25th of april, but amazon says its out right now and the peeps at tower records said that they should have gotten some in yesterday on their computer, but the delivery truck was late. also, they told me that i was the first person to ask about that album, which made me feel cool and stupid at the same time. yet, i felt more embarrased as i thought about buying the louis xvi album, which was the same album that a bunch of 14 year old girls also in the store wanted to buy. am i too old to listen to them, anybody, bueller?

Mar 22, 2005

human after all

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i've always been wondering what exactly happened to jordana brewster. she must've fled hollywood after the sheer, utter embarrasement of the fast and the furious and maybe cause she dated derek cheater for a smidge as well, but it's good to see her back on the scene, foxing things up. as for sara foster, i used to write poems about how much i didn't like her, then read 'em to my biology class before class. although, if it weren't for her, we'd be without maria menounos and you know how much of a bummer that would be.

i wish i could be going to the bloc party show tonight at the troub or the one last night at the glasshouse, probably chock full of sassy girls from riverside county, but alas, i'm in the midst of mid term madness and a majority of the classes are night classes. gallagher, i know, but life goes on. although, for as much as i want to see bloc party live, i honestly i think i just wanna check out girls. have a few beers and pretty much geek out over girls in cowboy boots.

the last thing about "spring break shark attack," anybody else notice shannon lucio's choice of footwear? cowboy boots, dude. i mean, if it's on tv and mary kate does it, then the hollister set will be hip to the whole thing right around summer time. cowboy boot tan lines, i will safely predict, not hot.

anybody else catch the last episode of "the osbournes" last night? can somebody please tell when kelly osbourne become the new elvira? the faux punk rock thing didn't work out, so now she's on some gothronica/i'm gonna say some poorly written one liners about my boobies tip? or is madonna, one of kelly osbourne's role models and much like madonna and gwen stefani, so she likes to reinvent herself constantly.

losing my edge returns to the blogosphere, of sorts.

n*e*r*d* breaks up, but the neptunes will continue to make bad records never the less. yeah, "drop like it's hot" was nice, but what happened? where are the super thugs and the gridin's? all we get nowadays are songs about skateboarding.

can the fine folks at fiji water set up me with an endorsement deal? i drink like three liters of water a day and it's becoming a bit too costly to maintain my lifestyle and drink all of this water. i mean, all of this water is why i still have this baby face. i have no problems with wearing goofy fiji water visors and t-shirts as long as i get weekly deleveries of fiji water to my house.

do you think that if anybody other than daft punk had made the album, "human after all," it would've been better received. like if u.s.e. had made the album, i think people would've liked it more. but here's the thing, the title says it all, daft punk is human after all and people do make bad art every now and then; it was bound to happen, sooner or later.

Mar 21, 2005

100 miles and running

before making with the jokes, i highly recommend checking out these jenny lewis solo songs, not trying to be political, the song, "rise up your fists!!" just floored me. the solo album should be out in the summer time on team love. [link via brooklyn vegan]

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why does jessica alba look so creeped by eva longoria? is eva longoria goosing jessica alba with the unseen hand? do we need to do a 'hands' check? or did jessica alba much like i first did, thought that eva longoria was paula abdul and was super bummed that only peeps like jeremy piven and paula abdul came to her gq party? or did jeremy piven whisper something rather awful into jessica alba's ear before the photo was taken? i can just imagine that jeremy piven will be outside of jessica alba's house, late on a wednesday night, pouring rain, singing at the top of his lungs, "two weeks in hawaii," the hello goodbye song without a shirt on, to win over jessica alba's affection, but after she yells out that she called the cops, piven is out of there and right into the spider bar, putting the mack down on some girl fresh off the stupid bus. or did like eva longoria just step on a duck, like two seconds before the photo was taken and it was one of those silent but deadly things and it's just destroying jessica alba's nose as the photo is being taken. or it could be that eva longoria is abnormally strong, so her grip is a bit too tight and jessica alba's ribs are getting crushed, i mean, we've all run into those tiny girls who compestate for the smallness with brutal strength, it's sorta like those dudes who drive this giganmorus trucks with the equally as large tires that blind you at night with their lights and what they're compenstating for.

did we all watch "spring break shark attack" last night ? i think i missed most of the plot points in the film because i was laughing so hard; i honestly believe the makers of "spring break shark attack" set out to make a film with the message that college men on spring break are the real sharks to worry about because we only care about one thing, much like how sharks only care about eating people who act like sea lions; so the film had two kinds of sharks: the sexual predator with a shelve less button up without an under shirt and a packet full of ruffies and there's the stock footage, rubber robot, beyond awful sharks of the ocean. who knew that shannon lucio aka lindsey from "the oc" had such a boobie game; i may have liked her more on "the oc", if they let her wear some tank tops every now and then. as i watched this, i came up with an idea to sell to hollywood, a remake of l'avventura set during spring break. the thing pretty much writes its self and we could get somebody like joseph kahn to direct and like ashlee simpson and adam brody wandering around cancun for i don't know, let's say, linsday lohan who has disappeared during spring break. you can shoot it in about six weeks.

all i can say about the film i worked upon this past weekend, is whatever maria full of grace was to drug mule films, the film i worked on, is like that, but for zombie movies. my only regret that i have is i did not act as a zombie. for as much as i love zombie films , i just passed on being a zombie simply for the fact, that on the day at chapman university when they show all the senior thesis films, i'm not in four of them; but instead, i'm in two and you can see my feet in another. i figure it'd make some kid whose parents dropped a gem on their film education jealous since i got pretty much the same education as he did and i spent half the money and i got my name all over quality work. hopefully, my name gets spelled correctly.

speaking of school, i need like a sidekick while i'm at school. the people that i'm sorta friendly with are girls and frankly, i don't believe the chumy-ness level i have with these people would allow for me to say, "hey, check out the knobs on that girl." so, i need some artie lange type of dude who'd go to school with me, you know walk around campus and what not, so i can get some laughs for my observational humor. i think why i didn't write that much last week because i had too many jokes about school. so you know, i need a big, hardy laugh when i say something about jewel quest. not to mention, i could use the extra body in my car on wednesday afternoons when i'm going home. the 5 is a real bitch around 5 o'clock, so if i carpool, it'd be a breeze. i'm not asking too much and if the dude didn't want to sit in my class with me, i mean he'd have to sit in class a few times, to catch up on a few reference points, but the dude could go down to the campus pub and have a beer and maybe bowl a couple of frames, my treat, of course.

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dang, what happened to mischa b? she looks like she's in her mid 30s and trying to make the 'oh, i'm curious' her new look. she's sorta scary, but fubar proves that mischa b can look hot while lounging around on a boat; way hotter than brittany gastineau on a boat.

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but check out rachel b at same thing, and the girl looks as cute as a button. after seeing her, i decided that i wanted to spend my entire spring break hanging around the new marc jacobs store in la, hoping that maybe i'd run into rachel b or some other girl on her level and pretend to try clothes on, but you know how these designer clothes are, either they're too tight or too big, no middle ground. i'd do it; i would totally be there, but i'm just not confident enough in my parking to pull it off. at my driving school, they said, that the dmv do not test people on parrell parking any more, so we don't teach it; i have no forking clue as to how to do.

and i would've continued on with jamie chung as the babe of the week, but i'm never home on monday night to watch "road rules/real world challenge: inferno 2" and frankly, i can't stand to watch another challenge with road rules veronica. yeah, no coral, but still, there's the miz and veronica.

Mar 17, 2005

don't forget!!!

dudes, this sunday, it's spring break shark attack at 9pm. i think the housewifes are a rerun or at least you can tivo it cause this movie is gonna be as good as spending the day at the beverly center with cam'ron and the whole dip set or at least as good as it would feel to kick howie mandel in the nuts. since you know, howie mandel is a dick.

guinness pout

for whatever reason, ever since i've turned the big 2-1 and was able to legally get drunk bars on st. patrick's day, something comes along and says, 'no, you can't.' whether it's school or not having a ride home. i can't get my drink on until like the next day and people at the supermarket look at me strange as i pick up a sixer of guinness and a box of drumsticks. what? don't you know that ice cream cones and beer go great together?

this year is no different. i have a 8am call time, so that means up by 6am and onto the freeway by 7am. sure, i could go to work with a hang over, but i dunno, carrying c-stands and setting up lights while in that condition doesn't seem too terriblely fun. although, i bet you dollars to donuts that many of those union guys i hold dearly to my heart do it all the time. probably one of the requirements to get into the union.

so, please drink a couple of pints and holla at girls like her for me. i wouldn't really holla at her at a bar, i'd just awkwardly look her over and wonder if she digs wong kar wai.

honestly, i've been watching this week are wong kar wai films and completely mad at myself for being so late to the game. holy shit, how amazing is fallen angels? didn't you want to drive like a character from that film would like right after watching it? cause as i was driving through the wendy's parking lot, i thought to myself, how would chris doyle photographed this? how cool can i make this little drive to the drive thru window be? then you realize, you're going to wendy's late on a tuesday night, nothing can make that cool.

Mar 16, 2005

an open later to james murphy

dear mr. murphy,

it's been roughly a month since the stateside release of lcd soundsystem's debut album and everybody is pretty much in love with the album. from the cool kids down onto critics of entertainment weekly. myself, i have taken it out of my car only once and that was to put it on my ipod and out of fear that an auto mechanic may steal it while my car was in the shop. so i was just wondering why you haven't lined up any shows in the states to support the album, yet?

while i do apperciate your humbleness about your band. it's great, but here's the thing, your band is great live. i've seen you guys a couple of times and "yeah" is rather amazing in person. like every single person there was jumping up and down, losing their mind and shouting, "yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah..." the whole time. it's crazy and more people need to experenice that. please don't let the number of people there at coachella be a sign that people don't like your band. dude, you had one of the worst time slots ever, the same time as the pixies and the band you made better, the rapture were playing at the same exact time. i went to coachella specifically to see lcd soundsystem and it was well worth the money spent, the sleep lost, the weight lost and the nose bleeds i suffered through.

and don't let that show at the echo detracted you from touring. that show was the same night as an interpol show and people in la, have the same type of love for interpol that people from brooklyn have for biggie smalls; it's crazy. the problem that radio out here is rather awful; there are stations that should be playing your songs, but frankly, they'd rather have some c-list celebrity spin records, so the station manager can have famous friends; it's bullshit. but it shouldn't keep you from touring. come out to la and play the troubadour. go to chicago, go anywhere because there will be people, lots of people there to see your band and they'll walk out of the show, saying, "that was amazing," wheather you want to believe it or not.

so please, james murphy, tour, it'll be awesome and you can make alot of money selling t-shirts to nerdy guys like me.

sincerely,

douglas reinhardt

Mar 14, 2005

party & bullshirt

ever have one of those moments where you see something that just utterly blows your mind that literally you're reduced to simple statements like, "dude, it's out of control. so out of control," and you try to talk to people about the matter, but they're like, 'i got like eighty million other things to deal right now, but like, yeah, cool' ; so you're this walking ball of nervous energy and excitement, waiting to explode, but everybody else has got other things on their mind, so you basically implode instead. cause, i'm like that, right now. shit in the past two days has been so out of control, in a good way, that somebody better call the cops.

i'd say something, but i think i'll just save for a script, zach braff style. so i'll just extended an unrelated/related thanks towards robin brown for letting me hang around the set of johnny benson even though, i showed up late to set on sunday (the ghosts in my house totally turned off my alarm). honestly, if anybody at a studio wanted to a film about myspace culture, then they should really buy the rights to robin's short film cause dude is nailing exactly in in the head, and of course, let him direct the thing.

speaking of myspace, i was at boot barn looking for a belt since all of the cool kids at my school wear the leather western belt and i figure, you know, i'm wearing a tan leather belt and you're wearing a tan leather belt, we should probably hang out, but that's beside the point. there were a bunch of high school girls trying on cowboy boots (if mary kate olsen wears them, then i have to wear them) and cowboy jackets, taking pictures with each new article of clothing. people will do anything for an interesting profile and will send annoyning bulletins about how they have new pics up and they want comments.

over the weekend, i learned that dogs have the same emotions as teenagers. dogs can be just as embarrased as when a 14 year old girl gets picked by her dad whose blasting huey lewis' "the power of love" after pep squad practice. the dog's owners, a married couple, who i assume are without children, walked their dog while wearing matching gray sweat pants outfits. i'm not talking about like the woman was wearing a juicy suit and the husband was wearing track pants of the same color, no they were both wearing baggy, gray, i'm completely over everything sweat pants and matching sweat shirts. their dog walked behind them, as if to gain some distance, but you know the whole lesh thing, tipped everybody off. the dog looked over at me and my dog, with that embarrased face you always got when you were out with your parents at the mall and you saw some cool kids at the mall, by themselves. i'm still trying to figure out the mindset of a couple that wear matching sweat pants. i could understand dressing alike, if you're going to be on like "the amazing race" or "wild & crazy kids", but not on an overcast saturday when you're just kickin' back. i mean, how earlier in life did these people throw in the towel? sure, sweat pants are comfortable but they are a house clothing; only to be worn within the confines of the house; when out in public, it means, you don't give a fuck anymore, literally. people who say they're not concerned with image are lying because if they weren't concerned, they'd be rocking sweat pants every single day of the week.

those women who wear the juicy suits just want to give off the impression that they work out, since you know, they don't.

bryan singer's superman blog; no word if he's gonna use it to pick on blogger groupies.

aicn says that guy ritchie's running buddy is the directof of the new x men movie; so be on the prowl for a film that'll bite on tarantino yet interviews they'll say, we've never seen pulp fiction. personally, the x-men films are the best superhero movies; so why get some hyperkinetic british guy whose has produced a couple of films and directed only one film before. i dunno, i dunno, i guess fox likes losing money.

and i'd like to say happy birthday to my sister, since it's her birthday and all, today.

Mar 11, 2005

too many tickets is the problem, man

if anybody wants to know what i thought about the 'beckisode' of "the o.c.", i got two words for you, spinal tap style: shit sandwich. at this point, i'm waiting for seth cohen to get a pet monkey and for red headed kid with a bowl cut to take up residence at the cohen household. while, the julie cooper in a porno is mildly interesting storyline, the rest of the show is stuck in backstoryville; we're still gonna talk about what happened a couple of episodes ago, and it'll be like this for like the next three episodes until our writers reach for that absolute last straw and think up of something new. honestly, i wish that these cool kids would become chum for the sharks in "spring break shark attack". at least, i know that thing will live up to it's name: it's got sharks and it's got girls in bikinis; all "the oc" has a bunch of annoyning people saying the same things over and over, but only in excleeding less clever and unique ways.

i'd write something about the new kills album and how good it is, but i think soviet panda beat me to the punch and did a far better job than i would have ever do.

ambitious outsiders has some new rilo kiley for your ears; me ears sorta believe the song could be from the upcoming jenny lewis solo album, but either way you slice it, it's good times.

one should never really count out the l.a. babes, cause they'll come out fighting. guns outs, ready to make you cream your jeans as well as make you laugh with their sassy impressions of zoolander

then again, you see a babe like this and you say, "oh, so that's why they call new york the capital of everything" and attempt to figure out what stuff you could sell to move there

i still can't understand why america's next idol can't be a babe. i mean, lindsey cardinale poops when she sings, dudes. look at her, she's all squating all over the place like she's on deck. i dunno about you, but once i learn that a girl goes to the bathroom, i lose any attraction to her what so ever. mikalah gordon has about as many moves as my cooking does: shake 'n' bake; the world doesn't need barbara streisand 2: electric bugaloo. who other than ashlee simpson types (girls who complain about how you never call them, but they don't want to talk on the phone that much and like after two smiroff ices, they're so wasted and can't function the rest of the night) like wilmer viladerrama types, like mario? are the people who voted more for these weiner kids than i did for the babe, still into unicorns and believe it's more than okay to wear flip flops in the winter time?

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forget whatever mean thing simon cowell ever said on "american idol" or the eventual mean thing that'll be said by that walking embodiment of why we don't do drugs or at least not too many drugs, faye dunaway on that wb show. even forget whatever horrible thing that lorenzo llamas and that infamous red laser ever did on "are you hout?" for the meanest thing ever said by a judge on a reality show was said by tyra banks on this past wednesday's episode of "america's next top model". tyra said to lluvy, "you have a shelly duvall quailty." did tyra mean lluvy projects an asexual vibe and has a body similar to nba never was been, shawn bradley? don't get me wrong, shelly duvall, great actress, check out her performance in rober altman's insanely creepy, 3 women, but the chances of shelly duvall giving a kid a boner are slim to nil. i mean, what did lluvy do to get a such comparsion? sure, she lives in t-shirts with ironic sayings from urban outfitters. i do too, but i get my shirts from paul frank, but that doesn't mean you should say the girl that she has the same vibe that drove a man nuts in a hotel in the moutains. i mean, lluvy's face is different and unusual, but you don't have to say shelly duvall. say quirky, next time.

i mean that's the sorta thing i wouldn't even wish upon my own worst enemies, to call them shelly duvall. personally, i think tyra should suffer the unbearable terror known as two frat chicks talking about how they are for two reasons: "friends" isn't on anymore and secondly, they can't be p.a.s for the show. an hour of that feels like a thousand years and you'll take your favorite pen and stab yourself in the arm to distract yourself away with the pain of it all.

the only other thing, i'd say about this cycle of "america's next top model," is it's gonna be the survivial of the bourgiest.

and honestly, after about watching, ohh, let's say seven minutes of lizzie grubman's "power girls", they'll give anybody a reality show on mtv these days. so be on the look out for skeet on mischa: the show. basically, it'd be me sitting in traffic, singing along to a gun called tension,creepily staring at hot asian girls at school all the while, i'm writing my blog enteries in a notebook. totally killer, no twinkle filler; question: does anybody know if lizzie grubman saw that thing at the end of raiders of the lost ark, cause homegirl is the second coming of james carville

Mar 9, 2005

it's all apart of a bigger plan

this girl just cruised by to tell me, that i was sorta wrong in my statements about nyc girls being better than l.a. girls. she said that some of them rock sophiscated ponchs and may have watched more jean pierre melville films than i have, but they can't get lenny kratviz to stop calling them when he's in town

can somebody please take the bong away from quentin tarantino? the dude is in talks to direct a friday the 13th movie, which makes no sense what so ever or does he just want destroy all of the cred he regained after making kill bill? or did his spilt with sofia coppola create so much mid life crisis angst that he needs to get it out by directing a movie about sexy teenagers getting murdered by a dude in a hockey mask? why not take up the sport of basketball or listen to a gun called tension to release tension.

am i alone in this thought, but does anybody else wonder what exactly ashlee simpson's 'best friends'/roommates/hanger on-ers do when ashlee simpson goes on tour? we know that she takes her personal assitant and glam squad along, but what exactly do her other two buddies do when the woman who actually paid for the house is earning her keep? do they actually have jobs, like one of them works at the abercombine at the beverly center where as the other has a gig at the coffee bean in santa monica? are they would be actresses or do i dream, are they struggling writers or even better, struggling stand up comics? frankly, i'm more interested in the lives of these girls than i am in ashlee simpson's. these two girls pose more interesting questions; i mean, all of these answers could be handled in a simple segment on the show; it's not hard to do. so maybe drop a segment where ashlee pouts around in track pants about how ryan caberra never calls for like the eight millionth time and throw in an voice over by ashlee and some snappy music and all questions will be answered.

such sweet news: kobe has 41 in lost to clippers, slips out of the 8th playoff spot are they ever gonna get somebody to coach this team? or will they just throw in the towel and hope for a good draft pick?

Mar 8, 2005

no wow

a heads up of sorts to hip hop nerds and beat groupies, daedelus along with bus driver will be doing the lunch time (noon) at cal state fullerton on wednesday, march 9th. come out and ask daedelus if he's got scott herren's email address, so all of those beat groupies could send him nudie pics cause "hideyaface" is just redonklicous.

i may have all sorts of music on my ipod, probably like nine days worth of tunes. yet the only song i had in my head all day at school was the theme song for hgtv. so if you run into me and i mumble to you: "you should see what's on hg," just smile and say, 'whateva, man.' although, a hip tip for those on campus and with ipod, listening to "finding out true love is blind" by louis xiv and walking around, is like the new synching up "dark side of the moon" with the wizard of oz. i assume, that it would work any other place, like the mall, but you know, you'd seem like a disenfranchised teenager whose been forced to go to the mall with their parents to buy luggage, if you cruise around the mall with your ipod on.

new sin city can be viewed here; i think i'm cringing in frustration as about as often as i'm smiling about this film.

anybody else think that sunday's block of "arrested development" was really weird and only kinda funny? the only thing about buster having a hook for a hand, had me in stiches, yet i feel really bad about laughing at it.

i believe that we as californias, should launch another recall against arnold. i have no clue as to what improvements to the state he's made since becoming the governimator. or whatever things he's done pales in comparsion to a larger problem plaugin our humble little state, the pot holes. the biggest problem of the recent biblic rainfalls isn't the inability to capture all of any rain, to help solve any drought problems, it'll be the day when some dude in a ford fiestva is being air lifted out of some crater on the 10 freeway during rush hour. the people are driving like drunks in an attempt to avoid these pot holes. it's another complication added to our already fucked up freeways and streets. i mean, why did we elect arnold in the first place if he wasn't gonna tackle the big problems? california, sadly is a state where you live or die by your car. there's no way around it, i've tried.

so why not pull resources and effort into fixing this problem? and not with some bullshit meter inside the car that taxes you for every mile you drive plan. nobody would drive if that happened and the economy would fall apart. why can't arnold do a bunch of commercials in japan and put his paychecks into some sorta fund to save our streets. that of course is unless, if arnold has the automotive industry's nose up his ass, then it explains everything and the oppurnity to drive down a pot hole free 5 north will not be in my lifetime.

i don't mean to be so political, but it oddly helps the point i'm about to make, new york city is better than los angeles. i came to this conclusion from looking at party photos by mark cobra snake & bronques last night's party. in nyc, everybody is in the club, you got your killer babes, indie dudes, and even a dudebro or two and sometimes somebody like hiliary duff hits the ipods of steel. at the clubs in l.a., you got anxeric man boys talking about their myspace profiles and young girls with pencil thin eyeborrows like my grandma has and layers upon layers of foundation that's been on their faces since the 7th grade. that's not hot. all you wanna do is take a wash cloth or if you're rather sinister, a water balloon to their faces and let their pores breath for the first time in 4 and 1/2 years. not to mention, you got bagels like apollo starr at the club. if you don't know who he is, consider yourself lucky.

now i say this without ever going to one of the bi-weekly steve aoki dance parties, but here's the problem with that, i gotta drive all the way up to la, pay like seven bucks, if not more for parking and probably not even have a drink because i have to drive home because i either have classes or an earlier call time in the morning. one could bring along a designated driver, but i dunno, you know drag somebody all the way out to la, to have them just hang out with you while you get drunk and dance around to interpol is pretty mr.bogus. not to mention, you look like a raging alcohol cause you forced your friend to drive you home. it seems like in l.a., you have to plan everything out like you're the parent living the kids alone with a baby sitter for the first time. you have to have everything planned out and organized, a list of phone numbers of people to contact who live in the area, so maybe you could crash the night on their floor. but i don't know about you, frankly, i feel like i'm getting a bit too old to be crashing the night on peoples' floors to nurse a hang over. you know in nyc, you can get drunk as fuck and catch a cab or take the subway home. you see, it's this ability to not be a slave to an automobile, that makes nyc better.

then again, the money probably spent on a cab would be the same amount spent on parking, so maybe that's the rub.

peace out to the cast of real world: philly. season finale airs tonight and i wish i could say, good riddence to those fucking wiener kids, but half of those winners are messing up the jamie chung show with their little pookashell necklaces and just overall annoynace. i mean, honestly, mtv, can't we have, road rules/real world challenge: the hot off where real world san diego's jamie hangs out with road rules extreme's angela and like, they hang out with the rich kids from "my super sweet 16" and like have water balloon fights while the coachwhips play in the background? you know, that'd be more interesting than seeing the miz doing his miz all over again. you know who the miz is? he's a failed professional wrestler who does a horrible rock impression. so if i wanted to see some wwf dude, i'd watch wwf, all right. and did anybody else notice that all of the gay guys on this particular road rules/real world challenge are on the same time together? weird. and can bruim-murray productions give veronica a job or something, so she won't be on every one of these challenges; let somebody new and foxier come in and get their shine on; like veronica's heyday of hotness was like 1999, if she ever had a hey day of hotness. mormon julie has got to go unless she does all the challenges in the special, mormon magical underwear. and i don't need these super crazy, you have about 15 minutes to break into front knox using these buffalo nacho wings from chillis and these ninja shoes, macgyver style mission. bottle rocket shit up, by like having a contest where it's how long can mike can go without make any reference to the miz or the rock or can somebody go a day without wearing a trucker hat or can dan not say something rather sassy or how many articles of clothing we can put onto veronica.

but yeah, that whole scene with jamie at the beach last night, girl gots a black belt in body karate.

Mar 7, 2005

i'd really like to complain, but then...

boys and ghouls, i have to admint that my mind in the past 72 hours, well give or take about 70 hours, has been everywhere but the blogosphere, expect for when i was watching rehearsals for robin brown's latest opus, johnny benson's adventures in the blogosphere; i believe i'm working as a p.a. on the film, but i'm fighting for the credit, "blog consult" instead. it's just very bizzare and surreal to see the actor whose play a character that's loosely/inspired by yourself say things that you've said in the past. you know, you start to second guess all your own little quarks and nervous ticks or you over do those particular ticks to mess with the actor's head, in a humble attempt to make the performance a smidge more bizzare.

everything has just been really weird and odd, the past couple of days and i place all of the blame upon "francis the mute" by the mars volta. that album, is cursed, i tell you. after listening to the album, i learned that my father has been without cable tv and like his cable company ran away and diconnected all of their phone numbers. at school, while this wasn't such a bad thing, it's going to be a rathe cliched statement, there was a scene going on in front of my building that was straight out of a fellini film. a big half circle of kids standing around, taking pictures of some babe with an umbrella in front of palm trees. the babe was doing all sorts of wacky poses and jumping around with the umbrella and i could not take a picture of the whole scene, cursed once again. then, i get a burrito for diner and i see one of the mildy attractive girls from my bank, eating dinner with metal dudes and not like the overtly dramatic tight black shirt and blue jeans and shoes that look like new balances but they're not new balances and they weren't like the skinny guys with long hair in isis t-shirts and black jeans, but they were the kind of metal dudes with really bad dreads and like jnco pants, eeewwww. then, my internet connection dies for a few days.

the album, while being pretty good, but frankly, to me, the album sounds like what if miles davis & santana did an album together, then had a dub remix by king tubby. i mean, those dudes can namecheck people like david lynch, bunuel, and fellini as their influences, but basically, they're making santana records; so long for omar rodriguez lopez to peform at the oscars in twenty years while diego luna butchers some song.

anybody up to do a phony test drive of a used car? cause road rules angela is selling the car she won on the show. if i did already have a good car, i'd seriously consider, going to la and buying the car off her, then maybe try to ask her out, but she'd be creeped and wouldn't give me the car after all. [via trent]

so dudes, get them shotgun blasts ready for tomorrow. i'll be back.

Mar 3, 2005

before i forget...

my friend, derek doi is finishing up his film this weekend and on sunday, march 6th, he needs alot of extras. so if you're free on sunday from 4pm to 7pm and live in the greater southern california area, come on down to the grove of anaheim. there'll be food and prizes, but more importantly, you'll get your name in the closing credits. and if this means anything, you could see me running around, carrying c-stands and what not.

so come out and witness movie magic!

hannah's song

seriously, i'm still in this haze about "spring break shark attack". i can't get past how great that title is and how horrible the movie is going to be. yet this movie has come out of nowhere, it's not even listed on imdb, so it has to be so embarassing that not even like lazy union guys want credit for. also, for "oc" fans, this film could be the reason for the abrupt, horriblely write off of lindsey's character last week. can you imagine the phone call shannon lucio's agent had to make to the oc people. "yeah, she's gonna be out of comission for a month cause she got a movie of the week. its called springbreaksharkattack."
then the oc people would say, "what's the name of the movie?" "spring break shark attack." then the oc people would be laughing and probably say that they'd do their best to work lindsey out of the show and came up with that horrible exit.

ummm, does anybody know how i could become one of those extras on e!'s michael jackson trial reenactments? i saw some dude, who i swear had to have been homeless; is e! pulling extras the same way they used to pull audiences for "politicaly incorrect with bill maher"? i'm more than willing to rearrange my schedule to play 'court observer #08' on this thing. although, i'll say this upfront, it'll be a struggle for me to not run up and take the wig off the dude whose playing michael jackson's attorney, if i was court observer #08 and also, it'll be another struggle for me to not get the giggles when the phoney michael jackson testifies or not to boo the phoney jay leno when he testifies, as well. do you think that daniel roebuck will reprise his role as jay leno on these reenactments or will e! go with joe fatale aka tv's little jay leno? i'm hopin' for little jay leno, personally.


the wet t-shirt/sports bra vibe is very low with the new crop of teams on the amazing race, but the bandanna vibe is way off the richter scale with these kids. i may have to play "the real world" game with this show (every time, somebody is wearing a bandanna, you put your bandanna on and get into an agruement with somebody over nothing and cry). i mean, part of the reason why you watch "the amazing race" is to see sorta cute girls in sports bra runnning around and have mental breakdowns and yell at their boyfriends about problems they can't fix.

m.i.a. joins the major leagues, signs a deal with interscope; album out in april

sorry, i lied. i checked out "american's next top model: cycle 4" last night and yeah, it's not that good, but i'm gonna go ahead and add lluvy to our list of girls, we're sorta feelin'. personally, i'm waiting for the impending sass fight between jancie dickinson and contestant brittany; i would say that somebody's top is gonna off, but they're probably gonna use their boobies as fists.

hollister should get on their shit and start cranking out those la jolla shirts. i've already seen somebody rockin' a la jolla t-shirt. don't these style mavens who prostitue the calfironian lifestyle know that la jolla is the new orange county. i mean, it's got everything that you love about the oc, but with an added religious vibe to it (there's a really big mormon temple in the city) and it's close to t.j., so you got that going on.

and finally, the new my chemical romance video, "helena" is probably the best video of the year, so far. i really didn't want to say that i liked the song, but it's really good. my chemical romance is a band that for me, seems like i'm too old to listen to them, but if the kids are listening to them, i feel better about the youthful.

Mar 2, 2005

spring break shark attack!


did anybody else catch the promo for the cbs movie of the week, "spring break shark attack"? i know, what the fuck? but dudes, check this out, we get to see lindsey from "the oc" get eaten by a shark. the thing should be in 3-d. spring break shark attack!

secondly, i must extend a thank you to uncle gramdo for the shout out yesterday.

50 cent has gone insane or at least in the midst of a serious roid rage that's making him act like tony montana in the last thirty minutes of scarface. dude, just relax. i mean, if 50 seems so hell bent on taking on the whole world, why doesn't he focus in other problems with the world, not the loyalty of the game or if fat joe got rich off of a club banger. why doesn't he start beef with bush's social security plan or with north korea's kim jong ill or with the fox executive that'll probably cancel "arrested development". lord knows that the show could use all the help it can get.

i wish i had a big backyard and, more importantly, friends, so i could have a house party that u.s.e. would play.

what was the deal with the girls and their dads at the ted leo show, last weekend at the el rey? ted leo=amazing musician; excellent over of "since you've been gone" even featuring a breakdown into the yeah yeah yeahs' "maps", but i'm sorry there was an alarming number of old guys. ted leo shows just don't strike me as the spot to trot out the trophy girlfriend, if you will. an arcade fire or modest mouse show, sure, yeah, i see that because it shows that you're still cool and with it; although in reality, it just shows you got your musical hip tips from music critic robert hiliburn's latest knob slob job in the sunday l.a. times.then it could've been a fathers & daugthers having a good time together; you know 'daddy-daughter rock out weekend', but just the whole scene was suspect, but ted leo is amazing, y'all should see him when he comes to your town.

also, it could've been a college professor hanging out with the co-eds weekend. if that's the case, then i'm not naming names nor faces, but i'm sending out an mass email that says, "ewwwwwwwwww, gross-o-ross" to the whole school.

i'm out on america's next top model 4, even though we're sorta feelin' brittany and naima


i did my part and voted for amanda avila and hopefully, you did too. cause, remember this year's idol should be a babe or at least a girl with a wacky name, so it's kosher if you voted for aloha, i did.

Mar 1, 2005

yr city is a sucker, my city's a creep


to the vending machine who gave me a pink lemonade when i was wearing a pink shirt, i think i can match my own clothes, just fine, thank you very much. i don't need lemonade bottle graminals to set my look off. although, this look is my tribute to trent of pink is the new blog because dude is like whoa, mya style, no less.

this year's american idol should be a babe. so please vote for amanda avila. yeah, kelly clarkson has bounce, but there's never been like a full fledge babe as the american idol. or at least, if she doesn't win anything, e! should call her and start cranking out new episodes of "wild on..." with her; she has that brooke burke vibe minus the fake boobies and amanda avila has the ability to show emotion, since you know, brooke burke was made in a mti lab.

no "my super sweet 16" tonight, but mtv is gonna give us a psychobillyfreakout by real world boringadelphia's sarah and another episode of "cribs" cause i just have to see how omarion is living. mtv should just re-run the commentary episodes of "my super sweet 16" again. i just loved how ava consistently denied that she had plastic sugery and how hart denied that he bought those girls all clothing so they show up to his party and how natalie called hart out on his collar up polos. so much better than seeing some rapper talk about what kind of shoes he has on his hummer. durst.

dear the producers of the upcoming fantastic four,

you got it wrong, the producers of into the blue got it right. people don't want to see jessica alba be invisible, they want to see her in next to nothing. watch the film's trailer here and see if it's not too late to do a reshoot on the film with a storyline about sue richards becoming a sports illustrated swimsuit model or a lingere model or whatevs.

if clear channel 103 is so indie, then why aren't they playing "blood on our hands" by death from above1979 like every other hour? why are they playing that awful, awful, awful, awful, awful song by rise against and that mondo retardo danny masterson radio show. they don't put him in movies, i don't watch him on tv, so what makes you think i want to hear his thoughts on the new kills song? or hear he ramble about dj-ing some maxim party and model girlfriends. they should give an air shift to some girl from kxlu who'd play roots manuva and tell a story about how she threw up outside the smell after a coachwhips show. now that's indie; but basically as it stands, the station should be called starfuckers103.

also, e!, nobody watches to danny masterson play cards with the non ashton kutcher/topher grace people from "that 70s show". i'd be into a show about kurtwood smith going to peoples' houses who are really big fans of the film, robocop and renacting scenes with them on their patio, but fez wearing one of his trademark knit, wool caps playing poker, i aint havin' that.

i think if more people had seen luis bunuel's the phantom of liberty, they would've gotten david o russell's i heart huckabees, well now people can see the bunuel film, out on dvd in may.

another complaint from the bourgeoisie:
-my ass gets sore from sitting on my wallet all day.


i've been out of the game for a minute, so please excuse me while i write about old news. the only real interesting that came out of the paris hilton hacked t-mobile sidekick (plug, plug) incident for me at least, was the discovery that model/actresses/playmate summer altice has a 714 area code.

the thing about summer altice is that if she probably had put on the pink satin p.j.'s at hef's house, she would've been a playmate of the year, instead of a struggling slashtress whose carrer will never get out of neutral no matter how many apperances she makes in fhmaximstuff with phony, force feed comes ons that appeal to that ever lucrative market of bros who are too afraid to buy real porn. am i supposed to believe that some girl who was an elite model hates shopping and loves to eat buffalo wings and drink coors light while watching the big game with your friends? that she's into dudes with a good sense of humor, so that's why she dated vin diseal? homeboy is about as funny as gallagher is.

so the point i'm trying to reach is that this should've been has a really unglamarous area code. contray to what my enemy, josh schwartz would lead you to believe, the newport beach/rich white kids who drive raise trucks that blind me with their lights when i'm driving home at night and listen to nofx but vote republican anyways/trophy wives in juicy suits that never really work out area code is 949. that's the one to have. where as the 714 area code is like where no doubt hangs out and ditches classes to go to disneyland and stuff. it's not as sexy or egocentric, so why does summer altice live out there and not in the 949 or in santa monica or like weho? manhattan beach is a very nice place to live with a respectable area code and it has all the features that might make a place like huntington beach living in, minus all of the bros, 4th of july riots, and beach blvd. i mean, can't summer altice buy a phone in maliboobs and say that her residence is the guest room at paul walker's beach pad?

actually what i think i'm trying to say is this, summer altice, if you had a better area code, maybe you'd get more work. people see 714 and assume that you're all about ska and would show up to castings in creepers and blue zebra print pants, talking about how awesome the suburban legends are and in the waiting room, your ipod will be blasting rx bandits tunes, distrupting the concreration of the other actors preparing for the scene.