&t skeet on mischa: Swimmer's Ear

skeet on mischa

i wouldn't have given you it if i didn't agree

Jul 31, 2006

Swimmer's Ear

First and foremost, is this as well as this Z from the Like? Or is just some random hipster girl with a black belt in body karate redefining the way women will wear cardigans in the very near future? Inquiring minds want to know.

The problem with Miami Vice or at least one of the problems with the film was Michael Mann. Mann makes guys movie, to use a horrible expression, but it’s a guy’s movie with a bit of intelligence behind it. There’s a good plot that connects the action sequences together and more on the emotional table than “I can’t wait for them to blow some shit up.” Take a film like Collateral which had an interesting storyline, some good characters, dialogue heavy scenes one minute, then an intense shoot out the next minute and style to spare. Mann created a solid and compelling rhythm with that film.

Yet with Miami Vice, he’s all over the place. The film has no particular rhythm. It’s just long in parts and too short in other parts. The thing that surprised me the most about the film is that, it’s rather chatty. I’m a fan of chatty films and I wish more people would be fans of them too because that’s all I know how to write, but the problem is that the dialogue in the film is just awful. Either it’s cringe worthy as we listen to Colin Farrell’s Crocket in his, I want to believe Southern accent talk about how he loves mojitos and then the female lead talks about how Havana has the best mojitos, then they take a speed boat to get them. What? I thought this was a movie about busting coke dealers. You know the stuff Rick Ross raps about. Instead Miami Vice just gets bogged down in being a film about the beautiful locales and atmosphere. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a beautiful film to look at. Great HD cinematography by Dion Bebe with amazing production design and locations. I have to commend Mann for his dedication for finding places that haven’t been on film or television before, but that’s the problem with the film. It spends too much marveling at the surroundings as opposed to moving the story forward or writing interesting dialogue or pumping in more action scenes.

I’d never call myself a fan of action films. At a time in my life, I loved them and I’m still a fan of late 80s/early 90s John Woo films (The Killer still blows my mind) and I do have a soft spot for Michael Bay. But most of the time, I’m not into action movies, yet while watching Miami Vice made me yearn and desire for action sequences. There are too many scenes where characters talk too much about business and conversations about covers being blown and becoming too undercover for the job. If Michael Mann was to turn this screenplay in a class, he’d probably get a C or even a D on it because all the dude is doing with the material is telling, not showing. Sure, seeing Crockett & Tubs driving a sports car late at night, slightly conveys that the audience is dealing with ‘cool’ guys, but there needs to be more than that; sure, it’s telling, but at the same time, one could just assume that the two guys are driving a sports car to compensate for the short comings in their pants. Thinking out of the box a little more than just scenes of guys driving ‘go fast’ boats (is that a technical term?) and nice suits.

There should’ve been more scenes of Crockett & Tubs kicking ass and busting drug lords. I did appreciate how Mann at the start of the film drops the audience right into the thick of it with the scene at the nightclub, but that scene just feels weak and unnecessary. Mann doesn’t need to go back to a nightclub in a film ever again because Collateral was a film partially set in various L.A. nightclubs and the final sequence in a nightclub, the K-Town club was a classic. He’s written the book and now, it’s up to other filmmakers to out do him.

The very few action sequences in the film are done well and has a great deal of energy to them; largely due to the handheld camera work, but there could’ve and should’ve been more in the film. The film lived up to my expectations; I was expecting to be disappointed and I was.

Speaking of disappointing? Have you seen the trailer for the new Scorsese film, The Departed yet? It’s cool to see Scorsese shooting in scope again, but something just feels off about it. Scorsese and Nicholson don’t seem like a pairing that would work out well. Sometimes, two great tastes don’t go together or people never learn that particular tastes don’t go together since Scorsese has yet to stop working with DiCaprio.

I would’ve been in the parking lot across the street from the Verizon Wireless Amphitheater aka Irvine Meadows last night for the CSNY show, but I got swimmer’s ear or at least, my left ear has water in it and the season premiere of “The Girls Next Door” was on. I don’t know but I want to believe that the things coming out of the mouth of Bridget’s mouth might, just might be a bit more profound than our man, Neil. On the previews for next week’s episode, Holly & Kendra are working on a plan to solve the whole Israeli / Lebanon conflict and it may involve somebody or some bodies getting topless.

The past couple of days have not been good to me health wise. Friday afternoon, I got my prostate checked and on Saturday, I get a some water stuck in my ear. Granted, water in the ear is annoying and lasts longer than having one’s prostate checked. But that had to be one of the worst things that has willing done to my body. As men, it’s something that sooner or later, we’re going to have to do. It felt as if I was pooping in reverse as the doctor checked back there. The weird thing was that the doctor was a woman and my friend Derek said he may have popped one if he had a female doctor doing that to him. The experience its self is so uncomfortable and the direct opposite of sexy. You’re in a foreign environment, pants around the ankles while some one you haven’t even shared a smoothie with, let alone a meal together, is sticking a finger in the most sensitive of areas. It’s such a personal moment, but it’s so brutal. It was a one night stand as my doctor coldly asked me if I wanted to clean up afterwards, then simply handing me a wet wipe. So bad. And I thought for a moment that maybe if I had a male doctor check my prostate it would’ve been more comfortable because I assumed that he would’ve treated the whole thing as if we were in a locker room. But I never appreciated the locker room experience in high school all that much either. And of course, I assume that it’s eight million times worse for women when they go to the doctor.

I must extend a thank you to whoever put me on the mailing list for X 17 Online. I love that site and I’d link to it, but it’s just like everybody else has linked to it and I just assume that everybody knows about it by now. How great is that video of Chad Muska being attacked by bouncers? What happened to that guy? He went pulling from the hot, slutty older sister at the skate park to hanging out with Nicole Riche to dressing like he’s a member of The Colour and getting thrown out of clubs he’s DJing. Jeepers creepers, so I guess he’ll be on the next season of “The Surreal Life”, right?

Kate Beckinsale digs the In-N-Out and that’s all I got. I just wanted a lead in to In-N-Out cause I was there the other day and I don’t know what’s going on with the world, but we’re becoming too lazy as dressers. Whoever thought it would be cool to bring the sweat suit should’ve been shoot all those years ago. Granted, I’m a t-shirts and shorts/jeans guy most of the time, but you know there are times, where I’d just love to cruise around wearing basketball shorts and no shoes. Those times, I’m generally confined to the house because it’s my fat, lazy bastard uniform. Yet with these pajama pants and sweat suits and what nots, it’s an excuse for people to wear their lazy, fat bastards uniforms out in public. Let’s nicen up the dance a bit, people. We don’t have to wear sear suck suits on Sundays or anything, but let’s not wear a pair of boxer shorts and a wife beater to In-N-Out. We can assume that I saw a girl wearing the uniform of a wife beater and boxer shorts to In-N-Out and I’m just wondering when exactly did that become acceptable clothing? Sure, it’s a lazy Sunday and she could’ve been totally hung over for the night before, but you know, when Clinton was in office, nobody would’ve been caught dead in such clothing. If they wanted to be lazy, then they would’ve busted out the scarlet letter of laziness, a pair of sweat pants. Of course, if the girl had been attractive, it would not have been an issue; well, it would’ve been a minor issue, but still. Come on, how hard is it to put on a pair of jeans? Just pick up them off the floor and put them on one leg at a time. I think even hung over, people can manage to pull that off.

Food for thought: Is the Dip Set Movement finally over? I still dig some of the new stuff, but did the massive disappointment of “Killa Season” put an end to it? Or are people really into Keak Da Sneak nowadays?

There’s been quite a bit of talk about the NBC show, “Heroes”. It’s supposed to be the next “Lost,” but honestly, it’s Unbreakable with more characters and no Mr. Glass, so far. It’s that same type of Superhero riff that Alan Moore hit 20 years ago with The Watchmen and Brad Bird hit more recently with The Incredibles. From the pilot that’s floating around online and will be available for a free download on iTunes in a month, the show has potential to be good and go into interesting directions. As it stands, it doesn’t seem as rigid in its structure like “Lost” is and well, with the way “Lost” ended its second season, I may need a new one hour drama to obsess over.


At 1:25 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

yeah, miami vice is a let down. it's a shame it doesn't even get going till it's over.

i firmly believe mann needs to make miami vice 2 just to correct the wrongs with this film. like all of gong li's dialogue is absolutely dreadful and the scenes between her and crockett just do not work nor add anything to the story.

seriously, jose yero needed to be in this film a lot more than he was his lines were fucking funny. total letdown. oh yeah was i the only one who thought shakira was in this film?

At 2:06 PM , Blogger Douglas Reinhardt said...

I'd be down for Miami Vice 2 just for more action scenes, too. The ending was cool, but there needed to be more of that.

At 3:56 PM , Blogger Reel Fanatic said...

Just wanted to say your blog just might have the funniest name I've ever seen .. peace out

At 5:36 PM , Blogger Passion of the Weiss said...

I don't know about you, but I've built a shrine to Keek Da Sneek. Very similar to Jobu in Major League. But with less voodoo and more chickens.


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